|
|
 Studio: VCX
Director: Satan
Cast: Desiree Cousteau, Dorothy Lemay, Serena, John Holmes, Joey Silvera, John Leslie, Jean Jennings, Tami Lee Curtis, Mary Ann Evans, Heather Ellis, Jamie Gillis
Like everyone working in the adult industry (and their mothers), I'm really into Satan. You have a Satan t-shirt, trading cards, bobblehead doll, some Satan rims, branded cereal, whatever, I'm all for it. Me and Satan, we go way back.
That is why I had to watch VCX' Sex Slaves of Satan. You figure, Satan has a choice in sex slave, so whomever he chooses must be pretty good.
The movie starts with a comfortable old groovy film strip/American International Pictures-style flute solo, letting us know we are either in for an exploitation movie or a driver's ed film.
Kathy defies her female handler and very soon she is put in stocks and ordered whipped by an evil doctor. With the speed at which she goes from patient to victim, I assume either a chunk of the opening was cut or this movie was always ripe for a William Goldman revision.
Similar is the transition from Kathy's post-whipping lesbo scene with her handler to a three-way with two dudes. Where did they come from? Who knows.
 I've only been watching porn since I got a job reviewing it, but I am reluctant to poke fun at porn bodies of the 70s and 80s with the standard hair quantity comments, but the sight of Kathy's furry blonde bush being eaten out at this point is distracting. Compared to today's super-smooth snatches, the hirsute parts of yesteryear seem like they present problems on the scale of de-boning a fish.
And the dicks don't seem as hard. We know now that that is because today's performers by and large take erection-strengthening agents, but it could be because the male talent didn't really believe in the script.
 Then the movie shifted to a bondage scene with the delicious Desiree Cousteau, though I couldn't figure out how it fit with the story.
It was then I realized that Sex Slaves of Satan was a compilation movie with nothing at all to do with Satan.
"These are the most extreme scenes in the history of XXX," claims the boxcover.
 Yes, there are some rape and bondage scenes, but no Prince of Darkness.
Three scenes into the movie, the discovery that this was a compilation and not a feature film with a cast of dozens was an adjustment, but then things began to make a little more sense.
 Then I began to realize that the good old days porn veterans talk about might have been fun off camera, but aside from history buffs and people eager to get another look at their first porn crushes (both of which groups are a significant part of the porn consumer base), this movie doesn't hold a candle to a current, vaguely-scripted gonzo release.
While the drugs many of the performers were on in this movie affected them differently than the drugs many of today's performers are on, there is nothing outstandingly golden about this selection of Golden Age clips; the music is murky, the lighting is dark and, save for some abusive language and the simulation of forced sex that wouldn't fit in today's porn milieu (although today's porn sex can be degrading in different ways), there are few remarkable elements.
 What is noteworthy is Cousteau, John Holmes in a few scenes, and the lack of surgical enhancements.
I'd argue that today's porn is better, but only better compared to this. Then as now, porn is just a flimsy canvas for viewers to project their own fantasies on, and nostalgia is a big part of that, which is why Sex Slaves of Satan, though notably devoid of Satan in the way today's MILFs are devoid of children, is a worthwhile movie to watch.
 Labels: classic, Desiree Cousteau, Dorothy Lemay, Heather Ellis, Jamie Gillis, Jean Jennings, Joey Silvera, John Holmes, John Leslie, Mary Ann Evans, minireview, Serena, Tami Lee Curtis
Read the Full Story
 Studio: Digital Playground
Director: Robby D.
Cast: Katsumi (prior to legal name change), Scott Nails as You
Portions of this review originally appeared on Fleshbot
"Ze first time I had sex I was 19 and I honestly thought I wasn't meant for sex," says Katsumi in the "Stories" section of her new interactive DVD. But for her 21st birthday she had a gangbang. What a difference two years makes. I should know - my 2006 Honda is really depreciating.
You might be confused about who the virtual you will be fucking in this movie: isn't she supposed to be Katsuni? Well, this movie was made during Katsumi's losing court battle but before she was forced to change one letter of her name to appease a distraught French woman who claimed she was being misidentified as a hot porn star.
It is a customer not scared of adjustments who purchases an interactive movie; there is a lot of direct address ("See? My titties are already hard," Katsumi says to you) and, the way Digital Playground does it, there is a lot of zooming back and forth against whatever greenscreen background Katsumi appears against.
But the "Virtual Sex" DVDs are unlike other movies in that the environment is rigidly controlled. The sound is clear and present and there are no distractions to take the viewer away from the star.
"So what do you prefer?" she asks. "My boobs? My pussy? My ass? Or my mouse?"
International symbols for those parts show up at the periphery of the screen when it is time for the DVD to become really interactive. Digital Playground's go-to stunt cock, Scott Nails, steps in as your proxy in Katsumi-servicing.
I'll take a break here and say that Katsumi looks really good, even if Scott Nails never consulted you about how you, personally, would service Katsumi. Only then would this DVD be truly interactive.
But lest you think that Katsumi doesn't care about you and only has eyes for Nails, she drops a bit of Gallic science on you before Nails delivers your vicarious load.
"I love being on ze top so I can make love with you - the way I want."
Labels: "digital playground", interactive, Katsumi, Katsuni, scott nails
Read the Full Story
 Studio: Wicked
Director: Randy Spears
Cast: Demi Delia, Daisy Marie, Cassandra Cruz, Maya Gates
The first thing one thinks when confronted with Wicked's new Latina Hollywood Hookers is, "Well Duh. You think there's Latina hookers in Glendale? It would be a step up to have Latina hookers in Glendale."
On that subject: Irvine Robbins R.I.P., whose first ice cream store was in Glendale. Mourn ya 'til I join ya (pours Friendly's Fribble on grave).
After the triumph of Cinco de Mayo we are faced with harsh realities: some Latinas turn to prostitution. Luckily the "hookers" of the title are not streetwalkers but classy call girls with phone numbers, credit at a florist, and their own couches.
Demi Delia is the head of this escort agency but, striving to stay close to her roots, also sees select clients. One is Ben English.
 In the first scene, English and Delia offer a valuable service to consumers, providing an example of the small talk and protocol characteristic of a session with an escort: he places the money on the table, she pretends to have missed him since the last time, and then they get down to it.
The only inaccuracy was that they kissed each other. That Wicked requires condoms made for more authenticity. If a hooker does not require a condom, you should run (unless you are only there to strangle her, in which case you should reconsider and go to Baskin Robbins).
 The second scene is even more authentic in its awkwardness. Tommy Gunn forgets to pay Sienna West until she prompts him with something legally innocuous, just in case he is a cop:
"Do you want to take care of business?"
Sienna West utters not one "Ay, Papi" throughout the scene, but she does imply she is a Latina by asking, "So do you like to fuck Latinas?"
 Daisy is a massage therapist in the next scene, and Randy Spears tells her that her "money is over there."
 Nick Manning plays a serial whoremonger in his scene with Cassandra Cruz. She asks if he has seen women from the agency before.
"All of them," he says. "And none of them can keep up with me."
 Finally, Alex Sanders and Dick Delaware sign on for Maya Gates. "You know it will cost you a little more?" asks Delia in the phone interview.
I found this scene the most verdad of all of them. The conversation was stilted and Cruz knew very little English. In fact, it was less like a porn scene and more like a hard-hitting HBO documentary, with poignant human drama everywhere you looked.
 One bit of dialogue I would have liked to see was:
"You sure you're not a cop?"
"You sure you're not Armenian?"
Wicked has done a great public service in releasing this prostitute primer. Still, I can't help thinking that if these women had been white, they would have been called "escorts."
Labels: Cassandra Cruz, Daisy Marie, Demi Delia, Maya Gates, minireview, Randy Spears, wicked
Read the Full Story
 Studio: Shane's World
Director:
Cast: Casey Parker, Devon, Paulina James, Aubrey Addams, Reena Sky
Portions of this review originally appeared on Fleshbot
Casey Parker's Golden State travelogue California Dreamin' follows the plucky Shane's World star up and down the coast where she finds love and learns a little about the state that allows if not condones her way of life.
The first stop is Catalina Island with a pre-pregnancy Paulina James and a pre-arrest Jack Venice. Reeking of alcohol, they are denied a bike rental. Somehow they are allowed golf carts. They make their way to the west side of the island and engage in some clifftop action against the overcast Pacific sky.
Back in L.A., Casey picks up Devon for a beachside romp. They race like blonde gazelles across the sand, if that's what gazelles do, and if gazelles can be blonde. Then they retreat to a bedroom where they compare tattoos.
"You have such a spankable ass, dude," declares Devon.
Next, it's off to wine country. Parker explains how raisins are made, then declares that she hates raisins.
 The blonder the partner, the better the scene. Parker meets Aubrey Addams in Napa and they repair to a hotel room (the initial promise of the outdoor scene with Paulina James fades as each vignette starts outside but ducks for cover pretty quickly; still, the effort is appreciated).
In San Francisco, Parker poses for pictures on a trolley. That she is so adorable and the guys she picks up are so lunky by comparison must appeal to the college audiences Shane's World caters to in the same way that Ron Jeremy is often helfd up as the hero of the average American male.
 Finally home (Parker did not get laid in San Francisco, she says, though Reena Sky did), Parker hooks up with Charles Dera for a scene with real chemistry.
Shane's World tries hard to maintain a reality-based road trip atmosphere in its movies, and the very personable and engaging Parker is able to pull this off where others might not be able to carry the movie. We like that she finally gets what she wants in the end.
Labels: casey parker, charles dera, devon, Jack Venice, Paulina James, shane's world
Read the Full Story
 Studio: Vivid
Director: B. Skow
Cast: Savanna Samson, April Blossom, Kimberly Kane, Maria Bellucci, James Deen, Brian Surewood, Evan Stone, Steven St. Croix
Portions of this review originally appeared on Fleshbot
Smoky backwoods Marianne (Savanna Samson) has a girlfriend, Lucy (April Blossom), that no one knows about. Not even her husband, benighted hick Darrell (Steven St. Croix). When Darrell comes home unexpectedly, he catches his wife in the brunette's Sapphic embrace and goes, as you'd expect, apeshit. To his credit, though, Darrell works through his rage by fucking his wife. We get the idea this is something they do to keep their marriage exciting.
 This is news to Lucy, however. After watching for a while she takes action. And in the aftermath, Marianne and Lucy must flee the scene of a murder.
They don't make it far. They are pulled over by an unnecessarily harsh police officer (Evan Stone) whose wife (Kimberly Kane) works at the police station. As it happens, Kane likes having sex in front of prisoners, as does her husband. We get the idea this is something they do to keep their marriage exciting.
 We see a pattern here. Marriages are the same the world over. What also remains unchanged is the time at the police station; it remains ten seconds to midnight throughout the scene.
 Things get bad. It's starting to look like Stone isn't a police officer at all. Why is there a mattress in the detention room? Why does Kimberly Kane get to smoke? Things become clear the next morning at breakfast with the dysfunctional family, as the culprits are chained to a dining room table and served eggs by Constance (James Deen), a halfwit in flowered underpants.
Marianne laments her life. "First I was living in sin," she says. "Now I'm living in Hell!"
 But Lucy is clever. She knows that one thing that halfwits like (other than french fries) is big hugs. She tells him that the girls will give him a big hug if he unshackles them.
But after he has his way with them, a way that is similar to the way all porn threeways are conducted (leading this observer to wonder if this movie is saying that halfwits are just like porn stars), Constance has the last laugh: he locks the girls away, too.
 But they manage to escape to the safety of a rural porn studio where Brian Surewood is fiddling with Maria Bellucci. Marianne and Lucy hide just in time for Stone to arrive. It appears that Stone is like a maniacal feudal lord, inspiring fear in all who walk his grounds. There really is a lot going on in this movie.
But I won't give away the end, save for the fact that comeuppance isn't equally distributed.
 Miles from Needles is a great porn movie. Like Rob Rotten's Texas Vibrator Massacre (also released this year), the movie takes place in a rural setting and lets the cast engage is some redneckery.
Kimberly Kane is especially good in white trash roles, because she is not traditionally porn star sexy, but sexy in a way that says "I would like to see her unhinged."
Newcomer April Blossom is a smoky-voiced vixen who does a great job with her first leading role. Paired with Samson, Blossom (whose name doesn't fit her - she should be called Smoky Sassypants or something) describes her partner in the excellent Behind the Scenes featurette as someone she just wants to grab and bite into. This is true of herself.
But Samson is the star, and rightfully so. A lot of higher-budget movies featuring contract girls reveal limitations, because some might be great to look at but aren't equal to the small demands of the script. Samson looks wonderful and she even uses a slight accent, and not as a distracting caricature.
"We shot the movie over two days (in July 2007), and we had the best time," said director B. Skow. "I've worked with most of those performers before, and they really made it look good."
Labels: April Blossom, B. Skow, Brian Surewood, evan stone, James Deen, kimberly kane, Maria Bellucci, savanna samson, Steven St. Croix, vivid
Read the Full Story
 Studio: Digital Sin
Director: Visual Blurr
Cast: Bobbi Starr, Lorelei Lee, Adrianna Nicole, Madison Young, Leighlani Red, Steve Holmes, Dirty Harry, Alex Gonz, Christian, Jon Jon
Portions of this review originally appeared on Fleshbot
Bobbi Starr is a schoolteacher with a secret in director Visual Blurr's Very Important Porn Movie, The Whore Within Me. From the moment we hear Starr's voiceover, about how all her life she did the right thing and if anyone could ever guess what goes on in her mind, we know that the digital crackling of the film, "Ringu"-esque buzzings and jumps, and the sepia filter will combine to give us one hell of a porn think piece.
"Would they believe their schoolteacher likes getting punished for the bad things she's done?" she asks. "God, I'm such a whore."
And yes, I guess she is. With freshly-painted face, Starr goes to a warehouse to be spanked and violated by Christian, who treats her most harshly. Conversely, could he have ever dreamt she was a schoolteacher??
The movie unfolds with several scenes of women telling the camera, the director, or themselves how and why they are promiscuous (with examples), and to the extent that we believe them they are more or less compelling. Shot over the span of a year by Blurr, The Whore Within Me seems to be a labor of love that now and then loses its focus. This does not mean that it is not immediately better than many porn movies; it just breaks some of the rules it sets up for itself, and that is a little distracting.
Meanwhile, Leighlani Red, a Natasha Lyonne-looking student in Starr's class, wonders how she can possibly write an essay about a life-changing event when she, herself, is a whore?
"Do I write about getting banged by the dumpsters?" she asks. Not if the essay is about "David Copperfield," but if the dumpster-banging really changed you, well, sure.
The sex scenes mean something, and they are masterfully shot by Blurr, who in the credits admits he was once studio New Sensations' warehouse guy. But Blurr throws a lot extra at what are already very good sex scenes; it does seem like they would be just as effective if they weren't so affected with editing tricks.
Lorelei Lee's scene is wonderful. In her Why I Am a Whore segment, she describes sucking off a friend when she was interrupted by a Very Special Guest, and how she chose to deal with it. Whether or not the story is true, it's an intriguing story, and we want to see what Lee does next.
"Nobody understands why we do the things we do," says Lee. "I like it when people treat me like a slutty piece of meat."
Blurr shoots his performers warts and all. Each is pale and easily bruised; there is no one in the movie a viewer would accuse of phoning in her scene.
Adrianna Nicole's suburban housewife deadpan is very credible, even though she is far from the suburban housewife ideal in real life. That is why she is an Actor.
"How do you tell your husband of eight years that you're a whore?" asks Nicole, cashing in on her double-team fantasy. "I guess that's why I'm telling you."
Finally, Madison Young plays the Ultimate Whore, crusing the streets of the northeast San Fernando Valley looking for the Aged to fuck her in the ass. She finds Dirty Harry.
"My body is a tool," reports Young. "And I love guys using it to get off. Sex is all I think about. It's an addiction."
While The Whore Within Me is not a feel-good porn movie, it is also not so earnest with itself that a viewer could forget why he or she is there. It paints a picture of these performers, who identify themselves by name, as along for the ride on their uncontrollable urges. because of the narrative setup, the viewer is asked to believe the story, and some performers have a better story than others.
One thing is certain: you expect Sasha Grey to show up in every scene, whispering "Yes, but I'm also a whore."
Labels: adrianna nicole, Bobbi Starr, Leighlani Red, lorelei lee, madison young, Visual Blurr
Read the Full Story
 Studio: Julie Simone Productions
Director: Julie Simone
Cast: Smokin' Mary Jane, Nadia Nyce, Gia Paloma, Julie Simone
The following could very well be a generalization but it's my goddamn website: as long as your fetish porn caters to the single object of a fetishist's fantasy, everything else can go to Hell. Thus so much fetish porn gets away with looking, sounding, and smelling awful, because a true fetishist's attention can be diverted from bad production value.
That is why Julie Simone's Smoking Interviews 3 is so much fun. While I am more likely than not to think women who smoke give good blowjobs, the idea of watching (admittedly) tasty women smoking for 80 minutes didn't appeal to me.
But I was fascinated from the beginning.
Smokin' Mary Jane is the smoking fetishist's darling. A marijuana legalization activist (in that strangely passive and chill way pot activists have), Smokin' Mary Jane is also a pinup siren. She affects a Coquette from Another Planet voice in her videos, and as she slowly disrobes and makes smoke rings, she tells us that she likes the way smoke disappears behind women's sexy painted lips.
Smokin' Mary Jane doesn't exist in reality - at least not that character, thank God - but paired with the props, the whole ambience she creates is great fun and an excellent way to start a movie that just gets weirder.
Next up is Gia Paloma, who dons nurses' garb to fuck an invalid (or maybe a mummy), a la The World According to Garp, and then fucks a bunny. If she weren't currently in a family way, I think the natural progression would be to fuck Abraham Lincoln. Naturally, all of these activities are conducted with a cigarette dangling from her lips.
If Mary Jane and Paloma satisfied a weird factor, then Nadia Nyce fulfills the quota for slutty, smoking bad girl. This is the stereotype I'm most familiar with, though I admit I have never seen anyone double penetrated while she has a cigarette in her mouth. For most Americans, the cigarette goes away before the sex happens, and reappears later. Maybe it's different in France.
"I first smoked when I was nine," Nyce says in her interview. "It made me look older. And cool."
Since this is the only smoking porn video I have ever seen, its effectiveness determines whether I will ever watch another one. Smoking Interviews 3 was so much fun that I recommend every household have a copy (though you should keep it away from your nine-year-olds).
Labels: fetish, gia paloma, julie simone, Nadia Nyce, Smokin' Mary Jane, smoking
Read the Full Story
|
|
|
|
Studio: VCX
