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    --Jun 20, 2007--

    Memoirs of a Madame

    Studio: Sinsation
    Director: Dee and Shy Love
    Cast: Shy Love, Lindsey Meadows, Brad Hardy, Vanessa Lane, Scott Styles, Cassie Young, Mikey Butders

    Portions of this review originally appeared on Fleshbot

    "I don't want to fuck fat old guys anymore," says Trixe, "I want to fuck rich fat old guys."

    Since watching "The Mission" on HBO the other night, I have been fascinated with hookers and their hierarchies.

    Granted, "The Mission" was about a Jesuit order in 18th century Paraguay, but the missionary followers of Ignatius Loyola share a great deal with Madame Shy, operator of a high class escort agency who just wants to get out, and Trixe, a two-dollar whore fixin' on replacing her.

    What they share is Difficult Choices.

    Sinsation Pictures releases artfully-shot couples' films with scripts and performers who are attractive in a way particular to hardcore couples' films rather than softcore couples' films. I came to this conclusion after seeing two people in a late-nite Cinemax movie who I'd just seen in a one-act play in Los Angeles. Does that mean that hardcore performers can't act? No, it just means that I wouldn't believe Shy Love as Nora in "The Plough And the Stars".

    Anyway, the movie begins with Trixe (Meadows) in two scenes of play-acting. First she works out with her john in a seedy motel room. A slap-bass soundtrack reminiscent of a Stephen J. Cannell montage sequence plays over their dialogue, full of dirty porn-standard patter that somehow sounds like taunting:

    "You like me Baby?"

    "Yeah I like you. Am I the biggest you ever had?"

    "Yeah Baby, you're the biggest. Am I warm and wet enough for you?"

    "Yeah Baby."

    Through my own exhaustive research with cheap hookers, I have found that none were as slight as Trixe, and not a single one wore fishnets. After the deed is done, Trixe looks in the mirror and practices curbside pickup lines, finishing with:

    "Hey, how about you pay me a lot of money to fuck you in your mother's car and pretend you're not a loser?"

    The scene switches to Madame Shy, embodying both Mr. Rourke and most of the characters Danny Glover has played: she's in a white suit and she feels like she's getting too old for this. She is looking for a replacement as a Madame.

    In a tribute to softcore "bordello" movies, Shy's manner is imperious and her words are clipped. "Leave us!" she snaps to her attendants as a favored customer enters. I don't know, I have a feeling that the adult industry plays at prostitution in the way that performers of Asian extraction play at being schoolgirls. I'm sure Heidi Fleiss never said "Leave us!"

    Introduced to Madame Shy, Trixe rises fast in the organization. But the other girls are jealous about being passed over by a newcomer. This also happened to Chief Justice John Roberts. Trixe breaks their spirit and builds them back up in her image by getting fucked with a strap-on.

    Technical aspects of Sinsation Pictures' products are still not first rate. The soundtrack is of the type that can be purchased along with certain editing programs, and at one point it is sped up ridiculously fast to accommodate the ending of one scene and the beginning of another. And we still hear the echos common to a movie set poorly insulated from the warehouse around it.

    But they are trying hard, and directors Love and Dee lend their own performing experience to staging excellent sex scenes. And the movie ends better than "The Mission" does.

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    posted by Gram the Man at 6/20/2007 | 0 Comments Links to this post

    --Mar 15, 2007--

    Tru Lies

    Studio: Sinsation
    Director: Dee
    Cast: Brooke Banner, Marcus London, Chrs Cannon, Mika Tan, Sledge Hammer, Jeanie Marie Sullivan, Presley Maddox, Jeremy Holmes, Nikki Hilton

    Portions of this review originally appeared on Fleshbot

    Trudy and Mark seem to have a loveless marriage. He is bored at his job, and she wonders if he is bored with her, too (already this strains credibility, considering what she wears to pour coffee). Regardless, off he goes to work, and then the deceptions begin.

    For Trudy is actually a secret agent who - believe it or not - uses sex as her calling card. Donning a black wig, she plants something on john Chris Cannon's night table, and then proceeds to fuck him (for the government). While I think she could have just left when he went into the bathroom to clean up before their coupling, she went all the way, like an American.

    Meanwhile, Brothel Boss Tanaka (Mika Tan, all crinkly in leather goods), demands extra service of her manservant.

    "Stop being such a lazy fuck!" she demands.

    Crime Boss Palermo, a loan shark, not only demands a 50 percent interest rate on loans, but also "a piece of your tight little ass". In this case, the piece comes from Presley Maddox.

    As if the rate of exchange wasn't already a little confusing, Mark's officemate needs to borrow his room for some (as his date calls it) "sweet lovin'". The date, like Trudy before her, is also a spy. Taking advantage of his freshening up, she steals a CD from Mark's desk, but then proceeds to have sex with his officemate.

    "I got exackly what I needed," the second spy says at the end, come on her face.

    The viewer by this point might be forgiven for wondering how these scenes are connected, other than the fact that the characters seem to be spies or criminals.

    I might be going out on a limb here, but at no time does sex really need to happen in this movie. (Though I'm glad it does.)

    The deception can't last forever, and by the end of the day Mark is at Boss Tanaka's bordello. She blindfolds him, saying she has a surprise, and in walks Trudy in yet another wig. Somehow the three get through most of a throwdown before Trudy realizes Mark is her husband. She doesn't even cock her head like Scooby when she figures it out.

    For a movie to have a plot, it must have a budget for one. The budget of this movie was big enough so that there was no excuse for the plot holes, often dismal lighting, and sometimes lackluster acting. My argument is that if money has been paid for a script, then the execution and proofreading of that script shouldn't be an afterthought.

    Otherwise, Tru Lies is chock full of leggy and juicy eye candy, and Tan, seemingly directing herself, delivers a fun performance.

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    posted by Gram the Man at 3/15/2007 | 0 Comments Links to this post

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