| --Thursday, May 29, 2008--
Enter the Adrianaconda
 Adrianna Nicole wishes, in retrospect, that she'd chosen a different porn name, but at least she can try on a new one when she's wrestling.
"If I'd only thought of 'Adrianaconda' sooner," she said.
Visitors to San Francisco (with the exception of school groups and religious zealots) should make a point of stopping by Kink.com's massive Armory building, built in the early 20th century during a time of nationwide worker unrest and featuring - I'm not kidding - a stream running through its basement for the benefit of a National Guard under siege (hint to disgruntled workers of the future: all you need to do is poop in the water; that's what my coworkers did at AVN).
Among the Armory's many charms is an indoor parade ground, dozens of creepy rooms used for water bondage and various flavors of submission with and without straps, and a wrestling ring.
 It is there that Nicole, redubbed Adrianaconda, will participate with 15 other wrestlers in the sweaty and pant-astic Ultimate Surrender, fighting against and alongside such bendy and brutal grapplers as Madison "The Butcher" Young, Amber "The Rogue" Rayne, and Ariel X: "The Assassin."
"If you win, you fuck the loser with a strap-on," said Nicole, who has made it to this semi-final round in "The Summer of Vengeance." "My incentive to win early on was I had been in a couple of scenes before my match and I just didn't want to get fucked again."
The wrestling starts off in bikinis and things devolve from there. I asked Nicole if she ever felt fear.
"Well, I'm a little bigger than most," she said. She mentioned Madison Young who, though wily, seemed easy pickings. "I could kick her ass. But her partner is very muscly."
 Next week Ultimate Surrender will film matches before a live audience of Kink.com subscribers on specially-erected bleachers, but the matches will be available on line up to and including the final showdown in August.
Whatever Nicole is doing with her left arm here doesn't seem like it would be in accordance with FILA standards, but whatever.
Other wrestlers in this season of Ultimate Surrender have included Annie Cruz, Delilah Strong, Bobbi Starr, and Harmony Rose, none of whom seems stoppable by mortal hands.
See a gallery of Ultimate Surrender's Season 5 here.
I am glad Nicole was not "Adrianaconda" from the start; the name seems to negate her sweet and gentle nature.
Previously: Back to the Apocalypse at the San Francisco Fetish Ball; Adrianna Nicole is her own massage table; Ultimate Surrender
See also: Ultimate Surrender, KinkLabels: "Kink.com", adrianna nicole, annie cruz, ariel x, bobbi starr, delilah strong, harmony, interviews, madison young, san francisco, WGL, wrestling
posted by Gram the Man
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--Thursday, December 20, 2007--
Mean Bitches aren't, really
 The website Mean Bitches, which features bitches being mean, either to other bitches or men who are bitches, but never to actual bitches, is doing a decidedly non-bitchy thing for Christmas, like dressing Germany's own Annette Schwarz in festive holiday heels.
Also, company president Glenn King is giving his employees some cash for the holidays.
"Each one of them is going to receive $300," he said. "They will then use $200 of the money to help someone in need. It can be a homeless person, a friend in the hospital, a neighbor who lost his job, or anyone else in need. They can give the money to one person or spread it out among worthy recipients."
And because nothing actually happens if it is not documented -
"They will videotape the giving, with either a cell-phone camera or by video camera. I will then judge the videotapes to see who came up with the best use for the money. The winner will then get an extra $200 for themselves.”
More documentation of people doing good deeds after the gap.
Satine Phoenix paid it forward by removing her shoes in the house.
Harmony paid it forward by shaving this guy's moustache.
Daphne Rosen ... well, Daphne wasn't nice to anyone.
Previously: Skateboard Kink Freak; Fetish Ball; Prod of the O.C.
See also: Mean BitchesLabels: annette schwarz, BDSM, fetish, harmony, satine phoenix
posted by Gram the Man
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--Tuesday, October 23, 2007--
Stuffing? I'm Stayin'!
 Whether on a stove top or on a Porn Valley rental couch, Stuffed, a two-or-three-hole-occupancy movie directed by Jerome Tanner (inexplicably credited as Lex T. Drill) stars some of my favorite people: Harmony, Joanna Angel (pictured), Sandra Romain, Jayna Oso, and Adrianna Nicole.
Something about the content of this movie brings each performer's voice down about a half octave, which I like; only Jennifer Tilly should sound like Jennifer Tilly.
See more snaps after the gap.
And Tanner throws in some angles that aren't so arty that they are a distraction from what we are supposed to see, yet they still look just a little different from everything else. Bravo.
For example, here's an excellent perspective on Adrianna Nicole. It's as if I'm there. I just wish that other dude wasn't interrupting my view.
 And here's Jayna Oso. I have seen Jayna Oso on three movie sets and during each scene she got extremely slick with sweat. This assures me that her glands are working. What's hotter than that?
Previously: Jamye Waxman: the female you; Smokin' Crack 3; Six in Me; Lorelei Lee and Adrianna Nicole - just because; I am the world's greatest porn director; Medical Pain Sluts; I'm repeating myself; Have a smoking Thanksgiving; Joanna Angel tackles boobs
See also: HustlerLabels: "joanna angel", adrianna nicole, directors, harmony, hustler, jayna oso, jerome tanner, sandra romain
posted by Gram the Man
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--Wednesday, September 19, 2007--
Joanna Angel tackles boobs
 There are a lot of things people are shy of talking about in today's porn industry: drug use, sexual harrassment, malfeasant distribution deals. Now Joanna Angel has the courage to say that Big Boobs Are Cool, and Burning Angel has released a filmic document of her beliefs.
Angel shot the movie here.
"I think boobs tend to be larger (in Los Angeles)," habitual Brooklynite Angel told me. "Maybe because apartments in New York are small, big boob girls can't fit their boobs in them."
Read more after the gap.
 Because Los Angeles is better than New York (it's also better than San Francisco and Seattle, in case you're wondering, but not Montpelier), Angel did as I predicted and as she denied she would do and moved here last year. She visits New York once every other month.
"You know how you always find what you're looking for when you're not looking for it?" she asked.
I thought about how I got a blowjob from my Media Theory And Literary Criticism professor. "Yes," I said.
"After the movie was done I found some big boob girls in New York. So maybe I'll shoot the sequel there."
 At first Angel's boobs were judged neither big nor cool enough for the film's director, Burning Angel co-founder Mitch Fontaine.
"So I went on the opposite of a diet," Angel said. "I ate a lot of fast food for two weeks. Because when you gain weight your boobs grow." (This also happened to William Howard Taft.)
 Angel employed the drive-thru technology of Jack in the Box and Del Taco and said that the movie captured "a little belly" which, sadly, she has since gotten rid of. "But I do have some big boobs."
"Your commitment to your craft is impressive," I said, reminded of Robert DeNiro's weight regimen preparing for Raging Boob.
As you know, Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement, is coming up at sundown Friday. I asked Angel if she and her boobs were going to Temple.
"No," she said, "but I will fast."
 "Good you're not doing Big Boobs Are Cool 2 the next day."
Big Boobs Are Cool stars Angel, Ariel Alexus, Harmony, and Adrianna Nicole.
View the trailer here.
Previously: Joanna Angel eats grilled cheese, tomato
See also: Burning AngelLabels: "burning angel", "joanna angel", adrianna nicole, breasts, food, harmony, interviews
posted by Gram the Man
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--Monday, September 10, 2007--
Wayne doesn't know why he's being interviewed, either
 What I like about porn PR dude Wayne Hentai is that he doesn't quote himself in his press releases for other people. Here he is with the stunning Mancunian Nikki Jayne in her US debut for Harmony Films and Porn Week, and he looks as incredulous as anyone that the microphone isn't being placed somewhere more obvious.
See a few more photos after the gap, in advance of a longer story.
 As you can see, my security detail took a few of these photos as Jayne capered around the gates of Gram Ponante Towers, Helipad, Apothecary, Centrifuge, Salmon Hatchery, Quarry, and Microbrewery.
"Darling Nikki," I laughed, "I would have let you in with more clothes on."
 Jayne reminds me a little of Carmen Luvana. It is not lost on me that Luvana, too, speaks English with an accent. Might they be the same person??
 Jayne is in town with Porn Week as it visits a stateside shoot of the London-based Harmony Films, directed by Gazzman.
Previously: Dreams really do come true at Porn Week; Wayne Hentai: Pornslinger
See also: Porn Week, Harmony FilmsLabels: "set visits", "vena virago" wgl, carmen luvana. england, gazzman, harmony, nikki jayne, porn week
posted by Gram the Man
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--Tuesday, July 03, 2007--
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While GramPonante.com is written for a tenth-grade reading level (in some countries), you must be 18 years or older to visit this site. Sorry.
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