| --Thursday, July 10, 2008--
Jason Sechrest Bottoms Up, but not Out, on RudeTV tonight
 My feeling is that Jason Sechrest doesn't need to have guests on his show because he's so entertaining on his own, but tonight Sechrest will debut his "Bottoms Up!" on RudeTV.com at 10 (PST) and do the safe thing by having a guy with an 11" schlong.
Sechrest hosted his gay and straight adult-oriented show on the former KSEX for several years and left that station in the exodus that followed its ownership change.
A year later, in the same studio KSEX once occupied, Sechrest will debut his weekly show with inaugural guests the gay performer Barrett Long and bisexual performer Keri Windsor.
Sechrest, true to form, will end each episode with a musical number.
Previously: RudeTV sprouts from the grave of KSEX; What has it got in its pocketses?
See also: RudeTV, Jason SechrestLabels: gay, jason sechrest, keri windsor, rudetv
posted by Gram the Man
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--Tuesday, June 03, 2008--
Location, location, location: Strap-on Club vs. Strap-on Motel
 Like Groucho Marx, I would not belong to a club that would have me as a member, especially a Strap-on Club, in which a paranoid and micromanaging Shy Love sends mixed messages to her employees.
But these are porn lesbians, whereas London and Dylan Ryan, the protagonists of Maria Beatty's Strap-on Motel, are real lesbians doing porn, which was an important distinction made in the landmark 1994 case California v. Squirt v. Female Ejaculation v. Urination v. Adams.
Two movies featuring women with strap-ons, one filled with high-heeled and porn-honed mercenaries, the other with a cast of two ladies who might very well be bike messengers who will tell you they're not into men - even for a price. What challenges!
 Director Maria Beatty's Strap-on Motel was filmed in Paris, Tucson, and downtown L.A. Its storyline is the noirish and jazz-inflected romance between London, a taut and undershirted wanderer, and brassy Dylan Ryan, prone to wearing hats. Will their love survive escalating airfares?
In the second installment of Strap-on Club, Shy Love presides over a secret society in ruins.
"The first rule of Strap-on Club is Don't Talk About Strap-on Club," she says, over and over. And yet people are talking about Strap-on Club.
But Shy Love is just as to blame as the Chatty Strap-on Cathys; at one point, she ferrets out loudmouth Michelle Avanti.
"You've been talking," Love says.
"Who, me?" Avanti says.
As punishment, Love orders Katrina Isis to fuck Avanti up the ass. With a strap-on.
If you were an executive, would you deliver the same consequences as a punishment that you would as a reward? Bad management, Shy Love.
Strap-on Club also stars Memphis Monroe and Nicki Hunter, always in danger of topping from the bottom, which is a no-no in strap-on circles.
See a gallery of both movies here.
 Strap-on Motel
Strap-on Club 2
Previously: Believing the strangest things, loving the Sex Mannequin; Beating up Amber Rayne at the Americana Hotel; Wig-flipping with Nicki Hunter; Gram Ponante announces The Oscars of Porn; Pussy Party via the Ass
See also: Bleu Productions, Sinsation PicturesLabels: "nicki hunter", crissy moon, gay, katrina isis, maria beatty, michelle avanti, new porn daily, porn lesbians, shy love, strap-on
posted by Gram the Man
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--Thursday, October 25, 2007--
"What has it got in its pocketses?"
 The last time I went to San Francisco I asked Tchukon Hunter, manager/co-owner of Mr. S Leather, "What's with the gays?"
In particular, I was referring to the complex series of colored handkerchiefs they wore in their back pockets to signal their preferences to others of their kind, in much the same way I will put on my right or left directional to indicate which way I want to go on the 118.
In the case of the gays, substitute "118" for "the ass".
Read more after the gap.
I apologize for sounding anthropological (and some consider a lack of comprehensive knowledge of hanky codes homophobic), but I was unaware of all the permutations.
Hunter handed me the following helpful guide:
 And don't try to interpret the "Born in the U.S.A." cover.
Previously: Counting floggers on the wall
See also: Mr. S LeatherLabels: BDSM, gay, geekery, instruction, san francisco
posted by Gram the Man
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--Wednesday, August 22, 2007--
Jason Sechrest's Twink-o-rama
 Jason Sechrest is a ridiculously talented raconteur and provocateur. He doesn't sleep. Thursday night at MJ's Bar in Silverlake he hosts The Porno Palace, featuring "lewd interviews, live dirty dancing, autograph signings and free porn giveaways."
This week Sechrest welcomes a young man named Jayden Holloway, billed as a twink porn sensation. I have never known my gay friends to engage in hyperbole, so I am sure Mr. Holloway is in fact a sensation even though I haven't heard of him here in the straight community, of which I am a leader.
Sechrest belongs on stage, so you should go see him even if you think twinks are a Hostess product.
Previously: Curious member of Flaming Ones
See also: Jason Sechrest, Jayden HollowayLabels: events, gay, jason sechrest, twink
posted by Gram the Man
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--Monday, July 30, 2007--
The Butt Wax has exploded, or: shoving trans fats up your ass
 Every day I receive boxes of excellent adult products that I mention on my global network of sites in reviews, casual allusions, paid advertising, or as simple prayers the faithful may use in novenas. Most of these products are very compelling.
But sometimes they are horrifying. Read more after the gap.
 The first thing I noticed when I opened the Topco box was that it was heavier than normal. Inside were two weapons-grade grrltoyz vibrators that I immediately dispatched to likely lady reviewers (read the review here) as well as a large tub of something.
That something was Bottoms UpTM Butt Wax Anal Balm, and it had leaked all over the box, sullying the vibrators.
"What's all over this box?" my vibrator test subject asked.
"I couldn't stop thinking about you," I said. That line even gets me out of paying my electric bill. You should try it.
Why Bottoms UpTM is trademarked and not Butt Wax was a mystery to me, as was the fact that the company had decided to go ahead and put anal balm in the title, too.
The tub contained 46 ounces of white goop (there were supposed to be 47, but one leaked out) and the directions were as follows:
Scoop it up and apply to desired area for lubrication and to ease discomfort. In this case, "desired area" means the ass. And this is, of course, fine, but where is the romance when you have to scoop something up and slap it like mortar on your intended's desired area? Maybe if you're a Mason...
But where this product just became wrong was when I searched for its ingredients, which consist entirely of partially hydrogenated soybean oil. Using this anal balm would be like shoving a super-sized package of McDonald's french fries up your or your partner's ass, minus the potatoes.
As any resident of the Castro will tell you, the nation's gay men have been using Crisco, which is mostly partially hydrogenated cottonseed oil, for generations. But the rule of thumb (or whatever) should always be: If you wouldn't put it in your mouth as food, don't put it in your ass.
Finally, if you are to use a product like this, remember that it is not safe for latex condoms; you'll have to go bareback with it, just like a real porn star!
Previously: Products for your down under from down under; Ladyboy or Cenobite?; The sacred semiotics of the stigmafoot
See also: Partially hydrogenated oils, CriscoLabels: cenobites, commerce, gay, marital aids
posted by Gram the Man
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--Wednesday, January 31, 2007--
How many letters after D are there?
 Were Joan and Melissa Rivers unavailable?
Kathy Griffin will host this year's GayVN Awards show in San Francisco. I don't know which entity does the bigger disservice to the other.
Also: does this make me a bitch?
See also: Kathy Griffin to host 2007 GayVN Awards showLabels: celebrities, events, gay
posted by Gram the Man
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--Wednesday, January 24, 2007--
Drag queens to gather, eat, play bingo
 Jim Steel and HIS DVD (the gay division of Hustler) will host Drag Queen Bingo at Hamburger Mary's in West Hollywood on January 31.
Steel is the director of On the Downlow, and is holding the Hamburger Mary's release party for that movie to benefit the Minority AIDS Project.
How do we know cover model Brant Moore is on the downlow? He is facing right but looking left.
As I have not been to church in several years, I don't know how much Bingo usually costs, but the benefit requests $20 a game. This sounds like a good deal, because Hamburger Mary's is also a bar.
When I used to play bingo, the only people allowed to be drunk were the nuns.
Do you think drag queens still dress as nuns? Is that an evergreen outfit like straight porn women dressing as schoolgirls? We'll see.
Previously: Night of the Stars recognizes freedom, snacks; Folk as Queer; Trend: Gays smarter
See also: Hamburger Mary's,Labels: dvds, events, gay
posted by Gram the Man
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--Thursday, December 14, 2006--
Folk as Queer, pt. II
 Charles Peyton, otherwise known as gay porn institution Jeff Stryker, might ultimately be successful in closing down North Hollywood neighbor Kulak's Woodshed after several years of city appeals, restraining orders, and name-calling exchanges with his foe.
Kulak's Woodshed is a smallish folk club located next door to Peyton/Stryker's office, from which he markets his movies and maintains his website. The Woodshed, operated by Paul Kulak, has until the end of December to make improvements that Peyton brought to the city's attention, or it must vacate the premises.
Read the original story here.
Peyton didn't immediately respond to an interview request, but this week commented on several aspects of the first article. It has been edited slightly (full version here). It appears that Peyton denies ever entering the club.
I did not try and play "Pop Ya in the Pooper" (at Kulak's Woodshed). I charge $10,000 an appearance. Why would I play in a dirt hole that I was already suing before the song even came out?
I was supposed to have been banned from a club I wouldn't have went in if they did pay me, back in 2001 (if you follow the Kulak notes). "Pooper" wasn't even made yet.
And that song was a comedy that I played for JimmyJoe who paid me $400,000
over the year I made it in.
Kulak charged me with violation of a (restraining order) for the sixth time; (Kulak is) 6'2" and works out every day; why would he be scared of little old me? I may have 40 criminal charges on my record (only because charges never leave a man's record) but I have no convictions,
so that means I was falsely accused a lot.
To make things short and sweet, I am a well known recluse, I get paid $10,000 to appear in clubs, I don't go to no talent places to listen to garbage and I have never (gone) into his place, that's what is so funny, (Kulak is) a freak.... It's easier for him to garnish a mob when he says it's Porn against Music. Fact is this area is no zoned for nightclubs (look at his recent guilty plea on my site) and I do not want one next door to my business office that I have had for 12
years. I have two attorney firms representing me in suing him and the city in excess of a million bucks and the whole story is on the site.
(Kulak) got people to file false police reports against me and cost me over 10 grand already, defending false charges placed by him and his liars. My criminal attorney is John Duran (and) has proven all of the claims to be false.
In Burbank court the judge told (Kulak) if he brought more false claims to his court, someone is going to JAIL.
The (restraining order) states, I can't attack him, I had no problem with that. I never attacked the freak to begin with; if I had they would still be scrapping his ass off the pavement... He really looks foolish being 6'2" and works out every day, claiming he is scared for his
life from little ole me. Unfortunately the guy's a stalker and he wants to be famous, so like many others they try and pit themselves against me to be considered an equal.
(Kulak is) on probation now for zoning charges, he is not supposed to be there.
Plus, the guy's running on donations (tax free) but is not licensed to accept donations so this Chicago-born con man is upset I am not allowing him to keep his ''Music Man" operation going next door.
You have to hand it to him, he has conned (L.A. District 2 Councilwoman) Wendy Greuel into denying me my rights and torturing me for five years now (why? Because I am of Porn, spawn of the devil).
He has already had the variance voided and all of the accusations I made have been proven true, next my attorneys sue the building owner and the city and I buy another few homes (in) other states. Typical, that's why the insiders of the Adult industry know me as "The Litigator". I don't like getting screwed, I am a top! When I first contacted Paul Kulak for this story, I reached a woman listed as his public relations contact. When I told her that I wrote for adult publications, she refused to speak with me. I said something about Intolerance being counterintuitive to the folkie aesthetic. She hastened to tell me that Peyton sold Stryker-brand pornography "within 400 feet of a school".
Kulak himself called me back later and I did not get the impression from him that he had any problem with what Peyton did for a living. I can't say anything about the rest of what Peyton says (the conclusions seem apparent) other than that the Porn vs. Music angle seems to be something Peyton invented.
"We can't move fast enough for the Judge," Kulak said, when I asked him if there were legal possibilities of his club staying in that location after December 31. I asked him what he would do if things didn't change in two weeks.
"I don't even want to think about it," he said.
Previously: Jeff Stryker: Folk as Queer
See also: Charles Peyton, Kulak's WoodshedLabels: gay, legal, news
posted by Gram the Man
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--Tuesday, November 28, 2006--
Jeff Stryker: Folk as Queer
 Jeff Stryker (a/k/a Charles Peyton), mostly known for his work in gay porn, has been warring with North Hollywood neighbor Paul Kulak and his small folk club, Kulak's Woodshed, and may succeed (with help from the L.A. Zoning Administration) in closing the establishment.
According to a representative of the 50-seat venue, which features nightly performances and a web simulcast, Peyton has been "the catalyst for our problems with the city".
Those problems will force the seven-year-old Laurel Canyon Blvd. hootenanny to close if they are not resolved by December 31.
Peyton has an office next door to Kulak's, from which he manages his businesses (Jeff Stryker Inc, Stryker Productions, and Nightlight Express), which include a website and the distribution of novelties and several videos.
"We're just trying to celebrate singers and songwriters here," Paul Kulak told me, relating that for several years Peyton and he were friendly.
Kulak said that Peyton began making complaints to the City of Los Angeles about the venue ever since he was banned from the club in 2004. Kulak had refused Peyton's offer to perform a song Peyton had written called "Pop It in Your Pooper", then Peyton began showing up to the club drunk and disorderly.
Kulak remembers that "Pooper" had a good melody but that the lyrics were inappropriate for his venue.
"If music makes your day lighter, more power to you," said Kulak, "but that's not the type of material I could have at the club {because} the web simulcast needs to be G-rated."
Peyton appealed Kulak's parking variance, and said that the club made too much noise.
Kulak said that during the three appeals Peyton made, in which he also appeared before the Zoning Administration to say that Kulak's had cost him "hundreds of thousands of dollars in lost income" because of the noise, Peyton had played "loud trance music" from his adjacent building.
"We measured the decibel level at 90 db, which was louder, two thick walls away, than the sound we were generating in our own club," Kulak said. "It was like the Whiskey was next door."
Kulak proceeded to get two restraining orders against Peyton, who he said threatened him and his patrons as well as urinated on their cars and threw feces.
"Peyton's vindictive crusade against me and the Woodshed is in retaliation for being banned from the Woodshed for his constant loud and disorderly behavior during performances when he used to visit here a few years ago. You cannot imagine the hateful, venomous and mean spirited determination that possesses him and what lengths this man continues to go to in his efforts to shut the Woodshed down," wrote Paul Kulak in an e-mail to Woodshed patrons and the L.A. performance community.
It appears that entities formerly supportive of Kulak's, including its landlord and the erstwhile renter of its parking spaces, are now bowing to city pressure, despite the intercession of City Council member Wendy Greuel. Kulak's will be forced to close on December 31 unless it gets its parking issue resolved.
As it is, Kulak's is now known as a "Private Membership Club" due to noncompliance with city regulations. People wanting to attend its free performances must apply through its website.
Kulak's does not refer directly to its impending closure on its site, nor does Stryker explain his grievance with the establishment on his own site, aside from pointing out that Paul Kulak has indeed pleaded guilty to unresolved violations.
From this vantage point it would be easy to believe that Stryker's feelings were hurt by his ejection from the venue and that he has done his best to get it closed, bringing to light violations that none of the other businesses in the area have complained about.
Blogger Lurk Ford commented about Stryker's performance at the 2005 "Night of the Stars" event:
Jeff Stryker (who got a lifetime achievement award) was the biggest jerk of the evening. He appeared to be drunk and he repeatedly (and for no reason) cursed out the host of the evening, Adam Glasser, and threatened to beat him up. Jeff is a drunk and frequently becomes so obnoxious at these types of events that he gets punched out. "He seems to crave attention." Kulak said (about Peyton, not Ford), "and it doesn't matter if he looks evil in order to get it."
Stryker/Peyton has not yet responded to interview requests for this story.
UPDATE: Folk as Queer, pt. II (12/14/06)
See also: Jeff Stryker (a/k/a Charles Peyton), Kulak's WoodshedLabels: gay, legal, news
posted by Gram the Man
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While GramPonante.com is written for a tenth-grade reading level (in some countries), you must be 18 years or older to visit this site. Sorry.
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My feeling is that Jason Sechrest doesn't need to have guests on his show because he's so entertaining on his own, but tonight Sechrest will debut his "Bottoms Up!" on RudeTV.com at 10 (PST) and do the safe thing by having a guy with an 11" schlong.
