| --Tuesday, September 02, 2008--
Upstairs/Downstairs with Tatiana Kush and Nicki Hunter (and these dudes)
 In a gated community among rolling hills to the west of Porn Valley lies Bell Canyon. Just weeks ago I went to a barbecue down the street from the house in which I now stood watching the near-translucent Tatiana Kush get doubly-penetrated by the international team of Marco Banderas and Tony DeSergio.
I haven't yet reached a point of otherness where I have forgotten what it would be like for the likes of a Tatiana Kush or Nicki Hunter to accompany me to the type of barbecue I attended down the hill. Bloodshot and frumpy women would gaze at the porn starlets sullenly. The menfolk in their blousy Polo shirts would fondle their chin folds. I would be murdered in the driveway. That's how it would be.
But not today. The elegant McMansion belonged to Claudio, a courtly older gentleman whom I first met on the set of a Denis Marti movie a few years ago. The common areas were strewn with muscle and high-end car magazines and Macchiavellian self-help tomes. Near-naked women in bits of porn garb padded barefoot on the low-pile carpeting, munching tidbits from Costco vegetable platters.
The shoot was an as-yet-untitled project for London's Harmony Films, producers of such fare as Slam It In A Slut and the Young Harlots series. I am a big fan of Harmony director Gazzman who hails from Scotland. He and partner Dave West, from Chicago, were shooting stills of the delicious Nicki Hunter downstairs while Kush writhed like a bug on a pin upstairs. Hunter herself would be shooting her first (D)ouble (P)enetration scene in more than 18 months when Kush was through.
 "I'm a little nervous," Hunter said. She was diagnosed with lymphoma in late 2006 and now, in remission and looking great, has returned to the adult business slowly, still displaying her full-tilt no-nonsense aggressive style, just not doing it seven days a week.
Hunter, not-dressed in bright yellow lingerie and looking especially vibrant and curvy, always makes me wish I had living World War II veterans in my family, because she looks like the type of girl they'd want to paint on the nose of a plane. But even in the Manila brothels of their whispered war stories they wouldn't be able to imagine the things Hunter can get herself up to.
And yet she was a little nervous.
"I haven't been D.P.'d in almost two years," she said. "It should be pretty interesting."
Try not to kill them, Nicki.
Tatiana Kush is a different story. She is as pale as Stoya and more slight. She is from Portland, OR and is wide-eyed and impish. She looks like she would absolutely destroy her mother's vice-presidential campaign.
"I'm 22," she told me, "and I love it in the ass."
"I'm Gram and I won't take work away from these foreigners," I said.
The foreigners were Tony DeSergio of North London and Marco Banderas from out Barcelona way. Before I met Banderas nearly two years ago, I used to think he was the devil. His teeth are so much whiter than mine. But he is like the Spanish Evan Stone, an unapologetic ham actor guaranteed to have a long career simply because he takes the work just seriously enough.
 The scene involved Kush lying on the bed and Banderas and DeSergio emerging from behind some frosted glass to tag-team her.
Q. Grams, these men's penises are centimeters away from each other as they share this girl. Does that get weird for them? Does it make them gay?
A. Etiquette is required when you are one of a pair of double-penetrators or part of a gangbang squad. Touching another dude is inevitable but, as Jack Fountain, gangbang participant and husband of Darryl Hanah, told me, "you're not allowed to get creeped out if another guy brushes against you; it's just when the touching gets vertical that you start moving away." If you think of all porn as an invented scenario, with people doing things in front of a camera and a crowd that (most) people would not do with the lights off in a windowless room and only their One True Love in attendance, then it is understandable to think that one's actual sexual preference is irrelevant in the face of getting the job done. (Plus, these guys are from the European Union. They've got co-ed bidets over there, and people swap wives with the same blase attitude with which they pay $12 for a gallon of gas.)
Gazzman crept forward with his HD camera and halo light. Wherever this scene appears on DVD, Kush will look like a very sexy ghost.
"What SPF do you use?" I asked.
"I don't," she said. "I'm a nerd. I stay inside and play videogames."
(Marriage proposals may be sent to her MySpace page.)
I was embarrassed to have not met Kush before, as she has been in the porn industry for a year, but in a business built of crisp white sheets she is almost invisible.
 During breaks in shooting I went downstairs. Poppy Morgan was there to visit. Morgan, the de facto hostess of Porn Week, which Gazzman launched with Dave West, is in L.A. for the summer until her work visa expires in early September, at which point she returns to Manchester, England.
Then the Porn Week crew goes to the Czech Republic where lucky and deep-pocketed vacationers get to interact with porn performers from around the world.
I wondered if Morgan and West could tell me if there was one thing they'd say characterized a European performer.
"I can always tell when a Czech girl is fucking upstairs," Morgan said. "It's mechanical."
"How do you handle that when you have to wrangle girls for a shoot?" I asked.
"Well, I'm just a twat to them," she said.
There does seem to be a difference between Porn Valley performers and the lithe and stern ice princesses of Ukraine and Prague that show up in porn shot by European countries.
"I don't want to say they're robotic..." said West, who just shot former Private contract performer Priva in a scene that he said was "unlike anything you've seen her do before" (i.e. under water).
 Upstairs the DP was 23 minutes along. Kush was being passed between Banderas and DeSergio like a towel in a racquetball game.
"Are you nasty?" demanded DeSergio of Kush. I think it was pretty obvious, but we are often reminded that we need to say "I love you" even we think it is obvious.
In America we have the tendency to ascribe class and nobility to anyone with a British Isles accent, so when Gazzman leaned over Banderas and said "Don't cover her nipples," it sounded like an ancient proclamation, like something William Wallace might say.
I had to go. I wished Hunter luck on her historic return to having both nether holes filled simultaneously by carbon-based life forms (I didn't actually say it that way), and was sorry to have not signed up in time. But then, neither had anyone at the barbecue.
See the gallery here.
Previously: Postcard from Porn Week; Pussy Party via the ass; Stoya finds cigarettes, pierogies in Philadelphia
See also: Tatiana Kush, Marco Banderas, Tony DeSergio, Porn Week, GazzmanLabels: "nicki hunter", dave west, gazzman, geekery, harmony films, marco banderas, Poppy Morgan, porn week, set visits, stoya, tatiana kush, tony desergio
posted by Gram the Man
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--Wednesday, July 16, 2008--
PSK gets wood
 As you know, the fifth anniversary is the wood anniversary, and it is clear from this morning's Porn Star Karaoke anniversary celebration (I arrived at 2 a.m.) that Nicki Hunter inspires wood wherever she goes.
I will admit that the lights were on at Sardo's when I arrived, but there were still dozens of people milling around, and I won't say how I got a shot of Jagermeister long after closing time. Well, yes I will: I brought it myself and served it from a container in my possession without any official sanction of my actions. In fact, a union-busted employee at Von's supermarket sold it to me.
Host Wankus, with a newly shaved head, regaled and revolted the audience with songs and tearful anecdotes. Selena Silver showed up. Tony Batmann was there. I saw none of this because I was five hours late. But people had a great time. Why else would there be a party in the parking lot until nearly 2:30?
 But Nicki Hunter was there, standing next to a No Smoking sign, taunting it, daring it to tell her, of all people, to stop smoking. Nicki Hunter could have burned that building down looking like that and people would have said "Oh thanks Nicki! That was great! Ouch it burns! Ouch! Ouch! You're not wearing underwear! Ouch my skin! Yay! Thanks!"
I drove home thinking this way.
See also: Sardo's, Nicki HunterLabels: "nicki hunter", alcohol, PSK, tony batman, wankus
posted by Gram the Man
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--Wednesday, June 11, 2008--
Secret Lives of Women (Who Are Also Porn Stars)
 Tera Patrick (pictured, with husband Evan Seinfeld), Gina Lynn, "Man with a Pussy" Buck Angel, and Nicki Hunter are featured in WEtv's "Secret Lives of Women" this week, as each veteran pornstress digs deep to reveal sides of themselves not already examined with clinical thoroughness.
The sister of the former Linda Johnson talks about what it's like to be related to a world-famous porn star, Lynn shares her thoughts on the Amish, and Hunter recounts her battle with leukemia.
Each women was followed for several weeks to tap her secrets, and I think this episode should give earlier installments of "Mafia Women" and "Sideshow Gals" a run for their money.
Previously: Erotica L.A. in a nutrag; Lori Lust conquers media, inbox; Stanhope "Just a fan"
See also: The Secret Lives of WomenLabels: "nicki hunter", buck angel, gina lynn, tera patrick, tv
posted by Gram the Man
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--Monday, June 09, 2008--
Erotica L.A. in a nutrag
 As the adult industry adapts to a changing economy it also continues to evolve. Nowhere was porn's dedication to the new sexual aesthetic more apparent than at this weekend's Erotica L.A., in which fans in and out of wheelchairs sampled the erotic future of 22" rims, glass bongs, and scented candles.
 And, in a tribute to erotica of the past, porn stars like Jesse Jane, Kimberly Kane, and Sunny Lane acknowledged the quaint fascination some people still have with naked women, like Tera Patrick.
Just as Apple will unveil new products at its annual convention, Mac Expo, Erotica L.A. was the place where the world first got to see the Nut Rag.
 "It's a towel you jerk off into," explained someone wandering by the unattended table. "And the towel has all sorts of euphemisms printed on it for jerking off. Get it? GET IT???"
 The annual three-day event was, as usual, a more intimate affair than the sensory overload that is the Adult Entertainment Expo in Las Vegas. The majority of attendees appeared to be from Los Angeles, as 90 percent of them were wearing Lakers-branded clothing. They milled through aisles lined with booths selling lingerie, naughty chocolates, male enhancement products, and Motorhead paraphernalia, and all seemed to be in good spirits.
Touching Stories
 Dominatrix Natali Demore was scared the first time a man asked her to kick him in the nuts. I was scared just thinking about it. "So I kicked him gently at first," she said, "but then he asked me to do it harder and I really let him have it."
"What sort of shoes were you wearing?" I probed.
"Heavy ones," she said.
Adult conventions welcome the differently-abled in a way the narrow aisles of Trader Joe's doesn't. There were a lot of familiar faces among the wheeled set and one guy, a paraplegic who went by the handle Big Daddy, approached Ava Rose and Bree Olson for a picture and they proceeded to get all over him, giving new meaning to the term handicapped accessible. "I know him from my MySpace page," said Rose. "He's sweet." Next time I go to an adult convention, I'm rolling up in my iron lung.
 Backstage at the FAME Awards, long known as the White Urban Spice Awards, Nicki Hunter interviewed attendees for the Internet station Rude TV, which is probably the only TV network that incorporates a couple of angry sperm in its logo. A delicious Sophia Santi and Penny Flame dropped by, and onlookers were treated to Flame's capering. Where I come from, we would call Flame a hot shit. (Somehow typing those words doesn't convey the affection that endearment represents).
"You fucked me," stormed a starlet at a FAME Awards organizer as he followed her through the backstage area. "You fucked me!" In that there were plenty of people around, I can only assume we were all meant to hear this exchange. "Fucked" in this case meant "disappointed."
"I hate these things," said Jenna Haze in the media room as she submitted to more pictures, and tried to leave. "But you need to do some soundbites!" she was told. "Nope," she said. "I'm leaving." Good for you, Jenna.
Jenny Hendrix was brunette. I didn't recognize her. I hadn't seen her in a while, and we had once been so close. "I'm taking it easy until my contract with (talent agency) L.A. Direct runs out on July 5," she said. "I'm not hurting for money."
"In that case," I said. "Give me ten million dollars."
"Is this your first Erotica L.A.?" I asked.
"No," the 22-year-old said. "I've been to three of them. I'm old."
Some day I'll be 22. I hope I don't feel that way then.
Justine Joli and Kimberly Kane shared a booth as well as a penchant for alphabetically sequential alliteration. "You should do a movie with LL Cool J," I said, and regretted it even before I'd finished saying it. But you really could go through most of the alphabet with alliterative porn names. Heather Vandeven was also there, promoting her new site, myheathervandeven.com. If only. The three have the same webmistress.
 Angie Savage introduced me to her friend Mia Presley. I like that they are friends; it makes me think the world will be better.
Satine Phoenix stayed for the FAME Awards' red carpet but didn't attend the show. She had places to go. I wanted to set up a barbecue in the back to compel her to stay, but it wasn't to be.
 Ava Rose was half barefoot. Some day the other shoe will drop.
"I need to get my girls through," said publicist Adella O'Neal of Digital Playground, shepherding a gaggle of contract girls to the front of the red carpet line. "I want to see Stoya!" said Roxy Deville. Me, too, Roxy. But Stoya should also see you.
Aiden Starr was in a cowboy hat. She doesn't know why either.
 "The last time I saw the two of you, you were naked on skates," I said to Sunny Lane and Bree Olson. Such a creepy thing to say, I thought. And yet it was true, and I said it. They didn't seem to mind. If they are reading this, they are free to say inappropriate things to me at any time. Seriously: any time.
Notable Products And Services
Little Fetish Fairy (littlefetishfairy.com)- This Orange County-based clothing line has been marketed to the discreet woman who is alarmed by aggressive BDSM gear and wants to appear feminine and willing but not be too in your face about it. It's a delicate balance.
The Pink Cross (thepinkcross.org) - Another organization renting space within an adult convention that seeks to liberate people from the adult indistry. They hand out a pamphlet with the testimonials of Sierra Sinn, Jersey Jaxin, and Becca Bratt detailing the horros of the adult industry. "We don't have anything to do with XXX Church or JC's Girls," said a spokesperson for the Bakersfield, CA-based ministry. "We provide hope for porn stars and porn addicts."
 The Chocolate Walrus - "Come and get a piece of ass!" I was told. "Come and get a pussy on a stick!" Naturally I assume this meant the Tijuana Chamber of Commerce had a booth, but I was pleasantly surprised to be given a chocolate ass. This Reno company sells sex toys and chocolate confections next door to the family-oriented chocolate store that manufactures its confectionary penises on the side.
Adult Decor (adultdecor.com) - Let's say you are a swinger or are no longer dirt poor, having recently won the lottery. Then this boutique, which sells erotic statuary, is for you.
Adult Vest (adultvest.com) - This company has some money behind it, and as such it was not apparent to me what it actually did (this happens a lot in the adult business). A small firm that seeks to introduce private investors to adult companies seeking funding for expansion, Adult Vest is like a few other organizations that, in recent years, have sought to bring Wall Street ideals to porn and to bridge the gap between mainstream businesspeople and their porn counterparts. Not the place to go if you want to shooot your first porn movie and need $30k, but a place to go, in theory, if you want to sell your studio or adult trade show.
Natch Snatch (natchsnatch.com)- This Baltimore-based company makes phthalate-free sex toys that "take the tox out of your box." Like many sex toy companies, this one grew out of a mainstream business that happened to have a lot of the necessary materials lying around, in this case: phthalate-free patches for children's clothing.
Clitoraid (clitoraid.org) - Not, as I'd originally thought, a soft drink, but instead an organization dedicated to restoring, through surgery, clitoral sensation to women who have suffered clitoridectomies at the hands of their tribes, fathers, husbands, and even other women. A clinic for the surgery is being set up in Burkina Faso, sponsored by the Raelians, a UFO cult that has close ties to Clonaid, which two years ago claimed to have engineered a device that cloned a baby.
I was attracted to their booth by the sign "Adopt A Clitoris" and a woman in pasties, who told me all about the organization, save for the Raelians and UFO cult connection. As we talked, a couple of guys tried to get pictures of her, and she asked them to stop taking pictures unless they made a donation. They kept doing it so I blocked their cameras with my massive frame. I hope the UFOs will reward me some day.
 As I was leaving on Sunday I heard a voice, a combination of Debra Winger and Valerie Harper that made me think of the movie An Officer And a Rhoda. It was Jamye Waxman talking about my frenulum in a Pleasure Chest seminar. After that conversation with Natali Demore, my testicles had not yet descended from my sternum. Waxman, as she has helped thousands before me, returned them to their natural pendularity.
 The Longest Line Award goes to Belladonna, whose queue extended pretty much out the door to the Staples Center.
See the gallery here.
Previously: Erotica L.A. 2006; Erotica L.A. 2007
See also: Erotica LALabels: "nicki hunter", "stormy daniels", Ava Rose, belladonna, bree olson, erotica L.A., events, jamye waxman, natali demore, penny flame, sophia santi, sunny lane
posted by Gram the Man
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--Tuesday, June 03, 2008--
Location, location, location: Strap-on Club vs. Strap-on Motel
 Like Groucho Marx, I would not belong to a club that would have me as a member, especially a Strap-on Club, in which a paranoid and micromanaging Shy Love sends mixed messages to her employees.
But these are porn lesbians, whereas London and Dylan Ryan, the protagonists of Maria Beatty's Strap-on Motel, are real lesbians doing porn, which was an important distinction made in the landmark 1994 case California v. Squirt v. Female Ejaculation v. Urination v. Adams.
Two movies featuring women with strap-ons, one filled with high-heeled and porn-honed mercenaries, the other with a cast of two ladies who might very well be bike messengers who will tell you they're not into men - even for a price. What challenges!
 Director Maria Beatty's Strap-on Motel was filmed in Paris, Tucson, and downtown L.A. Its storyline is the noirish and jazz-inflected romance between London, a taut and undershirted wanderer, and brassy Dylan Ryan, prone to wearing hats. Will their love survive escalating airfares?
In the second installment of Strap-on Club, Shy Love presides over a secret society in ruins.
"The first rule of Strap-on Club is Don't Talk About Strap-on Club," she says, over and over. And yet people are talking about Strap-on Club.
But Shy Love is just as to blame as the Chatty Strap-on Cathys; at one point, she ferrets out loudmouth Michelle Avanti.
"You've been talking," Love says.
"Who, me?" Avanti says.
As punishment, Love orders Katrina Isis to fuck Avanti up the ass. With a strap-on.
If you were an executive, would you deliver the same consequences as a punishment that you would as a reward? Bad management, Shy Love.
Strap-on Club also stars Memphis Monroe and Nicki Hunter, always in danger of topping from the bottom, which is a no-no in strap-on circles.
See a gallery of both movies here.
 Strap-on Motel
Strap-on Club 2
Previously: Believing the strangest things, loving the Sex Mannequin; Beating up Amber Rayne at the Americana Hotel; Wig-flipping with Nicki Hunter; Gram Ponante announces The Oscars of Porn; Pussy Party via the Ass
See also: Bleu Productions, Sinsation PicturesLabels: "nicki hunter", crissy moon, gay, katrina isis, maria beatty, michelle avanti, new porn daily, porn lesbians, shy love, strap-on
posted by Gram the Man
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--Friday, December 28, 2007--
Gram Ponante announces Oscars of Porn
 During a brief ceremony at the Lamplighter Restaurant this morning, the vaunted National Institutes of Pornographic And Pornotextual Arts changed the name of its annual awards from the Also-Rannies to its current title, the Excellence in Adult and/or Erotic Entertainment Honors. A simple nine-foot statue was wheeled across the parking lot.
"That looks like my Uncle Oscar!" someone exclaimed. "He is nine feet tall and also made of gold! You see, he was an alchemist and suffered from gigantism."
From that simple outburst (quickly repressed by police and clergy), a tradition was born.
Read the list of "The Oscars of Porn" after the gap.
"I believe in America," Beloved Porn Journalist Gram Ponante said at the quiet ceremony. "I believe that everyone should have his or her own adult awards show. And we are quickly reaching a point where the ratio of Americans to adult awards shows is 1:1."
Attendees wept and prayed as the awards were announced over strong cocktails and light salads. The spontaneous nature of the event kept any winner from attending, so in that way the ceremony was much like established awards shows such as the Adultcon Awards, the Temptation Awards, the FOXE awards, and the XRCOs.
Quintessence Award
Dirty Harry
"This award is presented to the person or persons who best represent the public's perception of adult entertainment. Dirty Harry often plays an incestuous scumbag who pimps out his daughter or seeks out women to beat him up. Harry truly is Dirty, and a scene in which he does not end up shrieking at someone or sobbing in his despair is uncharacteristic. God Bless You, Dirty Harry."
 Self-Lubricating Arriviste
Sindee Jennings
"As R.E.M. said, 'Everybody squirts sometime', but Sindee Jennings squirts all the time. She squirts for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, and if she lived in London, she'd squirt for tea. She might even squirt tea. And unlike other squirters who have taught themselves how, Jennings' squirting is wild and untamed, as if ordained by God. It does not feel forced, and its consistency coats, soothes, and relieves. She is also from Texas, where my people live."
 Sniffer Made Good
Dave Navarro
"Navarro circled closer and closer to porn until people started saying 'Red Hot Chili Who?' 'Jane's What?' While industry insiders might say that he has not paid his dues, remember that industry insiders rarely pay their cable bills. We look forward to a day when Navarro reaches 25,000 posts on porn chatboards like every other loser."
 Best Intentional Porn Comedy
Spunk'd
"Porn should be funny, and often is. Sometimes it seems people bend over backwards to siphon all the fun out of it. But this ensemble comedy starring Nick Manning and a dozen or so others achieves the lofty purpose of making a porn movie funny on purpose."
Best Unintentional Porn Comedy
Debbie Loves Dallas
"A textbook case of reach exceeding grasp. Both the movie and its director (and we made sure to verify this beforehand) had no intention of being so abysmally, unintentionally hilarious."
 Best Celebrity Sex Tape
Amy Fisher Caught on Tape
"A certified MILF who clings to her 'Long Island Lolita' roots, Amy Fisher, if I were a porn fortune cookie, would be 'Welcome at any gathering'. Without a doubt the best sex tape this year, because all the others were made to be watched by only a few people at most. This one was made for public consumption, even if half of the parties involved say it wasn't."
 Concerted Effort
Jenny Hendrix
"As Pink Floyd said, 'I've got the obligatory Hendrix sperm.' Hendrix works wicked hard. She has three phones working overtime. She hasn't taken a break since July. She makes drinks for people on set. She works well with others. She's thrifty, clean, and reverent. I would definitely recommend her for employment, a home loan, or cabinet position (preferably Reverse Cowgirl Secretary)."
 Male Performer Who Knows What Time It Is
Nick Manning
"For men who watch porn, watching other men is difficult, even impossible. And since no one will pony up for a greenscreen anytime this decade (despite porn being on the cutting edge of technology and all), the most we can hope for is that the male talent is entertaining. Nick Manning (close runner-up: Steven St. Croix) shows the perfect combination of acting and performing chops as well as a solid sense of where the male porn performer is in the firmament. He only steals scenes when there are no women in them. He doesn't overtalk, he shares the spotlight. And when allowed to do his thing, he displays the most sardonic character possible who still gets to 'wreck!' women onscreen. No one has a problem with Jack Nicholson playing the same character in every movie, so Manning should get an award, too."
 The Kami Andrews Wish You Were Here Award
Lorelei Lee
"Who knows if she will be back, but Lorelei Lee is gone now, and we miss her."
 Tony Conigliaro Award
Nicki Hunter
"This award, like its baseball counterpart, goes to the person who overcame adversity in style. Nicki Hunter was diagnosed with lymphoma one year ago and has returned to the adult business with equal parts vengeance and class. Congratulations also to the various fans and coworkers who got put personal gain aside to help out their friend."
 Best Porn Set
(tie)
Cousin Stevie's Pussy Party (all)
Barely Legal 75
"Usually I only spend a few hours in rooms full of naked women. Something changes when I'm there all day, as if I remember that there is an intrinsic value in spending the day with a room full of naked women. I feel like Caligula without the parts falling off. And Cousin Stevie and Erica Mclean run a very smooth, casual operation."
Best Logline
Cuckold - Chatsworth Pictures
"Sometimes the only thing wrong with your wife is you."
Best Inevitable Title
She Is Half My Age - Brandon Iron
"Porn has always been about older men and younger women. It seems more like Sociology class to watch people the same age having sex (that's why I stayed in college so long). This movie puts a name on the giddy joy one feels when discovering that $900 and an agent's fee can buy you Faye Valentine."
Biggest Comeback (Where "biggest" is the shortest intervening time between announcemment of retirement and retraction of retirement)
(tie)
Luke Ford
Kurt Lockwood
Belladonna
"Luke Ford announced he was leaving the porn industry yet continues to show up at porn events, Kurt Lockwood announced his retirement, paternity, and a move to Spain in September and returned to work in October, and Belladonna announced her retirement from performing and three weeks later announced her retirement from her retirement. Needless to say, some comebacks are more welcome than others."
 Most Satisfying Movie
Naughty Flipside
"When you get right down to it, the most effective porn format ever is the gonzo, in which setups are kept to a minimum and sex scenes get underway quickly. The scripted feature may showcase other talents of the cast and crew, but those are always exercises in diminishing returns, no matter how well-intended. Naughty Flipside Volume One presents the perfect combination of quick, fantastical setups followed by the lighthearted inevitabilities of Dana DeArmond, Sasha Grey, Adrianna Nicole, and Pinky Lee."
Ambition without Embarrassment Award
Upload
"Upload is a great movie. More than that, it is a movie that has high ideals. (Almost) nothing is worse than a movie that shows more of its creators' limitations than its creators' intentions, and this movie's intentions weren't grounded by budget, talent, or cast; every element shot for the sky. Also, there was sex in it."
National Institutes of Pornographic and Pornotextual Arts Director of the Year Award
Jim Powers
"Jim Powers is an effective porn director because he never forgets why the audience is there, so he keeps extraneous things like plot and guys' faces to a minimum. Despite this, he works so well within the limitations of the form that each movie is memorable and lightly-to-moderately sprayed with his own cultural references and cynical sense of humor. Watching a Jim Powers movie is the essence of a guilty pleasure, because you really do feel intellectually and spiritually ashamed afterwards. He's a genius."
 Quote of the Year
Alex Sanders to Julie Night, Upload
"Get it wet or I'll stick it in you dry."
Previously: Gram Ponante announces Also-Rannies Labels: "eli cross", "nicki hunter", adrianna nicole, awards, directors, eva angelina, jenny hendrix, jim powers, kurt lockwood, lorelei lee, Nick Manning, pinky lee, sasha grey, sindee jennings, steven st croix, steveporn
posted by Gram the Man
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--Wednesday, October 31, 2007--
Pussy Party via The Ass
 Sometimes writing headlines makes this line of work seem so tawdry, and unequal to the great events taking place in it every day.
Like Nicki Hunter returning to active performing after being sidelined by leukemia treatments for nearly a year, and a dildo that is also a bong, and Flower Tucci letting me use her whipping cream for my coffee.
"Don't use all of it," she said as I took the carton from the refrigerator. "That's going all over my ass later."
Read more after the gap.
Cousin Stevie's umpteenth Pussy Party, this time subtitled (at press time) "Tushies", featured the return of Hunter as well as generous-assed pornstresses like Sunny Lane, Tucci, Olivia O'Lovely, Luscious Lopez, Richelle Ryan, and Alaana Evans.
"We've got the A-team here today," Lane said, A meaning ass, "All the volumptuous girls."
"Volumptuous" is a combination of the words "voluptuous" and "scrumptious" that Sunny made up. You must pay her a quarter every time you use it.
The Pussy Party experience, as you've read in these pages before, is unique. Women compete for prizes in different configurations, and there is a rotating group of judges. Yesterday's judges included Kevin Blatt of sex tape brokerage fame and a couple of wealthy older dudes who had bid on their judgeship at last May's Skylar Neil Memorial Golf Tournament. They showed up in a $180k Mercedes and parked it next to my Saturn.
Inside the house we were equals, though I was the one who got Flower's ass cream in my coffee.
Like some directors in the business, Cousin Stevie does not hold the camera himself and doesn't sit behind a monitor. Instead, he's more of a presence in the room. He is a genial, old school guy that the talent loves and that his longstanding crew appreciates, though they know that a "Pussy Party" is a long day of work.
Stills photographer Alberto Lopez (no relation to Luscious) is by day a commercial photographer, and for the "pretty girl" (non-hardcore) pictures he wet down the poolside as if he was shooting a Ford commercial. Flower Tucci knelt on the wet pavement, looking far more appealing than the 2008 Escalade and only slightly more likely to roll over.
Porn Valley rental locations in this area of Woodland Hills tend to be owned by the same people. Off the top of my head, I went to the Operation Desert Stormy shoot next door and, across the street, have beeen to at least one of Stevie's sets and the filming of a Roy Karch movie on a summer day that was so hot I think the girls stuck to the pool table (I wasn't complaining).
The houses are surrounded by high walls and gates. Visitors usually park on the grounds. With a few well-placed tunnels and maybe some watchtowers, I think the owners could open a successful armed porn compound. Or the Kennedys could move in.
The big story of the day was Nicki Hunter's return. She looked great, like a far more frank Annie Lennox. Who am I to disagree?
 I don't know where these guys get their art. Maybe from the same offramp where I buy my oranges, but I had to take advantage of Alana Evans in the only way propriety would allow. She was an excellent Carol Not-the-Brady.
"My ass is so tight," she said at one point while I was talking with someone else. I don't know why she said it or who she said it to, but that's the type of thing that can draw people out of their own conversations from about 50 yards away.
"That's awesome," I said.
 Phallix Glass, which started out as a glass bong concern that morphed into a dildo company, combined those exact disciplines into a dildo that is also a bong. I think they should call it The Chronic Masturbator, but no one ever listens to me. Here's Trina Michaels. She doesn't smoke, but she smokes, if you knows what I mean. I sure don't.
I left early, to my regret, and joined the steady progression of traffic eastward/southward on the 101. It took me 90 minutes to get home; traffic was like ass, but not in a good way.
See the gallery here.
Previously: On the Set archives
See also: Cousin Stevie Labels: "cousin stevie", "nicki hunter", "set visits", 818locations, alana evans, flower tucci, luscious lopez, olivia o'lovely, pussy party, richelle ryan, sunny lane, WGL
posted by Gram the Man
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--Thursday, April 12, 2007--
Double the Nicki Hunter benefits next week
 There has been a large outpouring of love for Nicki Hunter in the past few months since the announcement that she is battling cancer. Two large-ticket events next week might be enough to neutralize her lymphoma with enough to spare that we can finally cure rickets.
HunterCARE, the foundation set up to ease Hunter's hospital bills, will benefit from parties at the Playboy Mansion and in Hollywood.
PhilanthroMILF DeBella organized a party on April 19 at Forbidden City, co-sponsored by SexZ Pictures, Red Light District, Hot Movies, Shane’s World, Jules Jordan Video, Wildlife, AEBN, AVN, X-Play, SugarDVD, Elegant Angel, Pure Play Media, Empire DVD-CA, Filmco, Oliver Ashe Hope, Glow Industries, Naughty America, and Northstar Associates.
The event is $20 for everyone and the public is urged to attend.
Two days later at an actual Forbidden City, namely the Playboy Mansion, Friend-of-Porn Hal Sparks (other Friends-of-Porn include Dave Navarro, Richard Dreyfuss, David Spade, and Tom Sizemore) will emcee a slightly more costly benefit for Hunter, the Kiss And Tell Party.
This will be the first time the Mansion and grounds will be open to the general public for an event, though Playmates will be frolicking in and out of the Grotto.
Admission to the Hunter CARE Playboy Mansion event ranges from
$350.00 for a Lady's single admission, $1,000.00 for a Man's single
admission, $2,500.00 for a Male or Female VIP admission, $10,000.00
for an all-inclusive Cabana VIP Party of Five, and $20,000.00 for an
all-inclusive VIP Cabana Party of Ten with either Lil Jon or Vida
Guerra. All tickets include open bar and buffet, ability to roam the
grounds and use of pool, and access to the after party
(transportation provided). VIP and Cabana packages include the
aforementioned benefits, as well as limo service from local hotels,
discount hotel accommodations, unlimited photo-ops with Playmates,
and other titillating perks.
The event is like several parties happening at once.
Also in attendance will be Snoop Dogg and Lil Jon as well as football players Lance Briggs, Franco Harris, Reggie Bush, Takeo Spikes, Correy Dillon, Rudy Johnson, Jeremy Newberry, and Erik Burgess.
The appeal is that porn stars will be able to ogle football players and vice versa. The worlds of professional football and porn do not normally mix. The closest porn has come to bridging that gap is when Tyler Faith dated a Boston Bruin.
Porn stars like Mari Possa, Brooke Hunter, Trina Michaels, Amber Peach, and Veronica Rayne will be pon hand to auction off lap dances and dates. It is assumed that football players have the cash for that sort of thing.
Previously: Wig flippping with Nicki Hunter, Plight of the Hunters
See also: Kiss And Tell Party, HunterC.A.R.E.Labels: "nicki hunter", events, playboy, WGL
posted by Gram the Man
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