Casey Parker will be on the cover of May's Hustler, with photos by Holly Randall.

If you were to subtract Casey Parker's age from mine, you would get the age at which I first discovered a Hustler magazine in the woods behind my junior high school in Bogue Chitto.

That is right: I was six months old.

Previously: XBiz Forum & Awards: Us v. Them; KSEX Awards: Meaty; Casey Parker and California's pioneers
See also: Shane's World, Hustler

Labels: hustler, Shane's World, WGL

posted by Gram the Man at Wednesday, February 28, 2007 | 0 Comments Links to this post

I attended Tightfit Studio's party last night at the Dragonfly on Santa Monica Blvd., lured by the evening's advertised program of seeing people getting whipped and savaged by other people for a change (because my arms were tired).

Alas, I saw none of that happening, but I did have enlightening conversations with several of the pornerati that flit hither and thither like melon body spray-scented butterflies.

Ava Rose was there with director DCypher. She seems to be growing into herself. She was wearing a scarf and looked decidedly unpornish. I love pornish filthiness on people like Gia Paloma, whom one would never confuse with someone who isn't a porn star, but Ava Rose is someone who, if you met her at a party, you might wish were a porn star, and resent her date because of it.

I asked her what she did for fun in Sutton, Alaska, where she and her sister, Mia, grew up.

"I clubbed seals," she said.

"Let me take you away from all this," I said, smitten.

So I did, and we went to a private booth where she played with my Zippo.

I forgot to ask her why she and her sister chose porn names that were also the names of women linked with Frank Sinatra.

When I first met DCypher I was interviewing for a production manager job with Andre Madness. DCypher was an angry young man at that point. Good nutrition and condo ownership have softened him. Now he is a Buddhist.

"Are you really a Buddhist?" I asked.

"Every time I tell you that, you laugh," he said.

I needed to be sure DCypher was not a Buddhist in the same way Lurk Ford is a Jew. It would crush my spirit. As in all major religions, he needed to be tested.

"'Bodhisattva,'" I said.

"'A' Won't you take me by the hand?'" he replied.

"'Bodhisattva,'" I repeated.

"'A' Won't you take me by the hand?'" he replied.

"'Can you show me - '" I began.

"'The shine of your Japan, the sparkle of your china - '" he interrupted.

I slapped him repeatedly. "Do not interrupt the moment of awakening," I snapped.

"Sorry."

"'Can you show me?'"

"'Boddhisattva, Bodhisattva," he said, achieving satori.

Satisfied, I moved on. I saw Gianna Lynn. Her movie, Cuntrol, was the inspiration for this party. We were in the chilly back room. She was wearing a sensible corset/bustier combo and some breezy slacks.

I wondered when the whipping would begin, and who would get whipped. A woman handed me an auto-erotic asphyxiation video.

"Are you in this?" I asked.

"No," she said, looking a little shocked that I asked.

"I'm not either," I said.

Everyone I like likes Oren Cohen, the owner of Tightfit. He is a third generation pornographer and he only uses women who are over 21 in his movies (unless they are Assraelis, but then they've at least served a year or two in the military).


I asked if he were worried that So Low, the auto-erotic asphyxiation movie, mightn't raise the hackles of porn watchdogs.

"Do you think people will worry that you are promoting unsafe practices?" I asked.

"Maybe I'm being naive," he said (you know that when someone begins with that, he is about to call someone else an idiot), "but should I be held responsible for someone else's idiocy?" he asked (zing!).

"I mean, everyone who is in this movie is over 21, they all do this at home, they're good at it, they agreed to it, they wanted to do it," he said. "At what point should people take ownership of this (meaning not trying to auto-erotically asphyxiate themselves after watching a movie)?

"It's why you don't see see-saws in playgrounds anymore...people are ready to litigate over things they should take responsibility for."

Now I like Oren Cohen, too. I just hope he gives the Palestinians equal time with West Bank Skanks or OrGaza or Palestina-Vagina. The only way the fighting will stop is if everyone is feeling sexy.


I looked around once again for whipping. I left at exactly midnight after staying for two hours. I quaffed two Jagermeisters at $8 each, leaving a 20 percent tip, because I'm a Buddhist.

The whipping started immediately thereafter, I'm told, the atmosphere finally free of my serene nature.

Previously: Meet Veronique Vega; But is it good for the Jews?; XFanz porns burlesque; The Name of the Rose;
See also: Tightfit

Labels: events, interviews, tightfit

posted by Gram the Man at Wednesday, February 28, 2007 | 0 Comments Links to this post

April Flores, looking like Justine Joli's sassy British barmaid sister, gets a tongue bath from Kimberly Kane at the Alter Ego 2: Voluptuous Life premiere last weekend.

Previously: At home with April Flores and Carlos Batts; Porn and spelling; Still life with Santa, toilet; Belladonna in a haystack
See also: Fatty D, Kimberly Kane

Labels: events, WGL

posted by Gram the Man at Tuesday, February 27, 2007 | 0 Comments Links to this post

APX Foitruss writes:

A newly-single friend of mine who happens to have the herp just set me hip to 'The Code': apparently herpes-positive singles (or swingers, one supposes) can include '437737' in a personals listing to let other herp-positive types (or herp fetishists) know what they can expect.

Perhaps most curious (other than my momentary fascination with this concept), while I found plenty of results when I typed The Code into Google, there were zero results (and) when I typed it into the Craigslist personals. Conclusion: Either no one in L.A. has herpes or those who do are big fat liars.

That number spells out "herpes" on a telephone. I tried dialing it and reached the operator.

"Do you have herpes?" I asked.

"No," he replied.

"You're a big fat liar," I said. "A big fat liar with Herpes. Now connect me to L.A. Direct Models."

In service to you, here are a couple of other numbers to use in your personal ads:

22846542: Catholic
466537: Hooker
7734626886787363328437: Pregnant (and) unsure of father
77346268472647328437: Pregnant (and) Gram is father
3323364: Dead dog
7792467284545377387: Psychopath (likes pets)

Previously: Public libraries at east coast island resorts support porn; Porn chicks say the darndest things; Porn stars divert attention to breasts
See also: Herpes Dating

Labels: found

posted by Gram the Man at Tuesday, February 27, 2007 | 0 Comments Links to this post

It appears from this news clipping from a Michigan paper that, since there is no real law against being Satan, the Vice President was hauled in for having relations with a dead dog.

Michigan's Bay City Times posted this article about Ronald E. Kuch, a man charged under the state's existing sodomy law for a tryst with a dead dog behind a daycare center, next to a photo of Dick Cheney after the latter's escape from a Taliban suicide bomber.

Kuch was charged with sodomy because there's nothing on Michigan's books about what a man and a dead dog (who love each other very much) can or cannot do.

Kuch's attorney, Kathryn Fehrman, argued that a dead dog is not an animal and therefore cannot be violated against its will. I agree. I believe a dead dog is actually a desk.

Cheney used similar logic when he said that waterboarding was not torture. It's just "a dunk in water," he said.

Previously: Send it down; Shane's World made me a dick
See also: Judge says local suspect will stand trial for sodomy (mlive.com), Rum, Sodomy & the Lash

Labels: found, news, sodomy

posted by Gram the Man at Tuesday, February 27, 2007 | 0 Comments Links to this post

The problem of creatively naming porn movies - series in particular - is vast, and I have nothing but sympathy and a routing number for directly deposited checks for those company owners faced with this daunting task.

Still, unless the likes of Kristina Monroe (pictured) and her friends are actually energized and fortified by an "overflowing of sperm", allowing them to complete other tasks, I don't think Fuel Injected is a very good title.

Good picture, though, despite the fact that there is no evidence of a super-hot pussy overflowing with anything. Maybe that's why she's holding the front of her skirt down? I don't know. It is a puzzlement. I don't even know if you'd call that a skirt. It looks like a denim coffee filter.

Labels: "lethal hardcore", dvd

posted by Gram the Man at Tuesday, February 27, 2007 | 0 Comments Links to this post

Vivid has announced it is delaying (or stopping altogether) the release of the Kim Kardashian sex tape, scheduled to be available this Wednesday.

Vivid co-founder Steven Hirsch has always allowed a little wiggle room in press releases about the rights Vivid secured for the DVD (for an alleged $1 million), saying, "We remain very confident that we have the legal right to distribute this video."

The sale of the tape was arranged through a third party and, though it is reasonable to assume that at one point Kardashian signed a release (thus Hirsch's confidence), it is equally reasonable to assume that Vivid recently received a cease and desist letter. Calls to Vivid were not immediately returned.

"We feel it is most important that we have an opportunity to meet with Ms. Kardashian as soon as possible," Hirsch said today. "We have reached out to her to try to set up a meeting.”

Such a meeting, I think, would require a very good lunch.

Previously: Wrangling a sex tape; SugarDVD enters friend of celebrity sex tape market; Images of heaven (that take me to Hell)
See also: Vivid

Labels: celebrities, hype, non-events, vivid

posted by Gram the Man at Monday, February 26, 2007 | 1 Comments Links to this post

As you know, Europeans are often mysterious and furtive, ordering Coca Cola with their cellphones and riding around on scooters. That is why Hustler/LFP has decided to send one of its own to Germany to set up a distribution arm for the company.

Hustler had previously used a third party distributor in the region, but the distributor was having money problems, making it difficult for Hustler product to get to stores and those little cafes where Europeans like to gather and smoke their cigarettes.

"Our reputation suffered," said LFP senior vice president Jeff Hawkins. "The third party frankly was not getting the job done and had really tarnished the name due to the lack of capital spent to advertise and promote us."

Helen Clyne, a longtime associate of Hustler, will head the distribution office and warehouse in Krefeld, Germany.

"It should be noted that although this company is opening initially to distribute Hustler Video, VCA, and our distributed lines," Hawkins added, "by no means is that what it will stay. In other words it will become Hustler Europe: the European office of everything Hustler, such as lingerie, retail, clubs, apparel, et cetera."

Previously: All about All About Anna; Austyn Moore's Secret Society; Wrangling a sex tape; Sandee Westgate to not appear in There's A Black Man in My Ass 2; Ninn to self-distribute in 2006
See also: Hustler

Labels: business, commerce, hustler

posted by Gram the Man at Monday, February 26, 2007 | 0 Comments Links to this post

This has nothing to do with porn, but porn poster/boxcover designer Alaska is now also selling t-shirts to Black Metal consumers.

Pictured is his Bathory Alaska design, perfect for the Blood Countess among your loved ones or, more to the point, a fan of the band that brought the world such favorites as "Storm of Damnation" and "In Conspiracy with Satan".

Now Quorthon enthusiasts, when performing rituals in their new t-shirts, can say "The guy who made this shirt knows Justine Joli", and Eon McKai, texting from a Yoshinoya Beef Bowl, can say, "My boxcover designer is into demons."

Previously: Porned Alaska; alt.squeal
See also: Alaska!, Bathory

Labels: commerce

posted by Gram the Man at Monday, February 26, 2007 | 0 Comments Links to this post

As you well know, a porn teen and an actual teen are rarely the same thing, but that is a problem that is too big for us to tackle.

That is why we at Gram Ponante Towers, Rotisserie, Clambake, Crematorium, and Salmon Ladder are proud to announce the International MILF Registry, which will solve the "What is a MILF?" question for consumers.

After lengthy discussions with porn luminaries, clergy, and The Hague, we have determined a set of MILF standards;

1. In order to be considered a MILF, a woman must have physically borne a child, whether vaginally or by cesarean section. Children born from the forehead, as was Jupiter from Saturn's, also qualify, in addition to immaculately-conceived children, provided they actually exit the mother.

2. All parties must be cognizant of the MILF's motherhood, whether she be 18 or 50. This can be established contextually by dialogue like "So you're my hot daughter's boyfriend?" or "So you go to school with my Joey?" or "Do you want to see where Tammy came from?" or "De Bella, you're embarrassing your daughter."
From now on, only movies whose "MILF"s meet the above criteria can receive this coveted and epilepsy-triggering seal of approval.

This "first-time MILFs" movie, asserting actual motherhood, seems on the level. Until proven otherwise I will grant it a seal. If I find out different May God Have Mercy on Its Soul.

Now if we can only do something about the Asians...

Previously: VCA embraces pixelation; Because I could not wait for MILFs; Michelle Aston will eat your girlfriend like a chicken sandwich; Your mother should probably be arrested; Your week in MILFs; Cheyenne Hunter: the loneliness of the long-distance biker-MILF

Labels: business, dvd, MILF

posted by Gram the Man at Friday, February 23, 2007 | 6 Comments Links to this post

As you know, the fourth coming of Britney Rears has been anticipated like the second coming of someone else.

To that end, Jamie Elle, playing Britney Rears' sister, takes the heady occasion in stride as she receives direction from svengali Will Rider.

Rider has just told Seth Dickens (left) and Donny Long to find something to do with their hands.

Producer Jeff Mullen has wisely avoided drawing too many parallels to the other Britney in this latest story, which takes place on and off the set of Prime Time Uncensored. Hillary Scott's Britney Rears will not shave her head, have her able motherhood called into question, or descend into madness (but she may in Corruption 2: The Genociding).

Previously: Britney Spears continues to hold out hope of immaculate conception; I submit to Britney Rears; Tits, transitions, and a sort of homecoming
See also: Britney Rears

Labels: "set visits"

posted by Gram the Man at Friday, February 23, 2007 | 3 Comments Links to this post

Because I am bound to my journalistic standards as if by mighty cables, I asked Hillary Scott today if she was pregnant, as has been reported by various outlets.

"No, I am not," she said.

"Why would someone suggest that at all?" I asked.

"I don't know," she said. "And I did a scene with Lexington Steele yesterday, so that's like a spontaneous abortion."

We were on the set of Britney Rears 4: Britney Goes Gonzo.

"What's different about this movie?" I asked.

"I don't know," she said. "People fuck and say stupid stuff."

Then BR4 was made about my life, which I have modeled on Corruption. Someone's getting a lawsuit from my ambulance chaser tomorrow morning.

"I can take you away from all this," I said to Scott.

"Let's go," she said.

Previously: Britney Rears: Special Victims Unit; The Britney litany; Speed dating with Hillary Scott; Britney Rears not pregnant
See also: Hillary Scott

Labels: "set visits", WGL

posted by Gram the Man at Thursday, February 22, 2007 | 0 Comments Links to this post

Shot in 2005, Player's Club (directed by Barrett Blade) featured a heavily made up slip of a thing named Kirsten Price as well as an even slippier Jenna Haze, who hadn't performed a boy/girl scene in three years.

Distributor issues prevented Rockstarz Films from releasing this movie, but now Platinum Blue has the job. See Jenna Haze in scenes Blade said were "a favor" and before she mounted her comeback in earnest with Jules Jordan.

Here we see Price and Haze in Porn Standard Pose #7, lips parted but not wide enough for sandwiches to enter.

Previously: Before they were dieting; Also-Ranny winners
See also: Rockstarz Films

Labels: "platinum blue", dvd, rockstarz

posted by Gram the Man at Thursday, February 22, 2007 | 0 Comments Links to this post

Remember yesterday when I said that the only thing that could ease me out of my despair was an awards show? Well, Adultcon will be throwing just such an awards show on June 9 at Hollywood's Key Club, and nominations for awards will be accepted until March

The Adultcon Awards are based on the same voting system as the Emmy and Academy Awards in that they are voted on by members of the adult community

...says the press release, revealing that if you had a problem with Crash winning Best Picture last year it was the adult community's fault.

Performers may nominate themselves in the following categories by visiting the website:

BEST ACTRESS AWARDS

· BEST ACTRESS FOR AN ANAL PERFORMANCE

· BEST ACTRESS FOR AN ANAL / VAGINAL PERFORMANCE

· BEST ACTRESS FOR AN INTERCOURSE PERFORMANCE (this confuses me -are there aspects of intercourse I don't know about?)

· BEST ACTRESS FOR AN ORAL PERFORMANCE ON A WOMAN

· BEST ACTRESS FOR ORAL PERFORMANCE ON A MAN

· BEST ACTRESS FOR SELF-PLEASURE PERFORMANCE

BEST ACTOR AWARDS

· BEST ACTOR FOR AN ORAL PERFORMANCE ON A WOMAN

· BEST ACTOR FOR AN INTERCOURSE PERFORMANCE

· BEST ACTOR FOR AN ANAL PERFORMANCE (head up one's own ass doesn't count)

Previously: Cleopatra of the Nile wants you to die; "A fine spray of legitimacy"; XBiz Forum & Awards: Us v. Them; Will there be another Temptation Awards?; KSEX Awards: Meaty
See also: Adultcon Awards

Labels: adultcon, awards, events

posted by Gram the Man at Thursday, February 22, 2007 | 1 Comments Links to this post

Who am I to say a porn title is distasteful? Why would I have no problem with Assraelis but think Cuntrol is a little too on the nose? Is it because I remember Eddie Baranowski saying "Cuntrol" at lunch in the cafeteria when we were in fourth grade, and the rest of us giggling?

Gianna Lynn will host Tightfit Productions' release party for its whiptastic movie Cuntrol on February 27 at Hollywood's Dragonfly. Also in attendance will be flagellist Master Dominic, who will coordinate the live bondage show.

But back to cunt. It seems that only the British can say it in a way that strips it of its harshness.

Who can forget Jack MacGowran, speaking from Hell through the possessed Linda Blair in The Exorcist:

Do you know what she did? Your cunting daughter?

Delightful. Or John Lennon in this outtake of a song written about Paul McCartney:

How do you sleep, ya coont?

Even Queen Elizabeth II sounds witty and urbane when she says it:

Hey cunts: In remembering the appalling suffering of war on both sides - a war started by Hun cunts, I might add - we recognise how precious is the cunterrific peace we have built in Europe since 1945.

But when we say it it just sounds kind of mean, even if porn is the most appropriate place to use that word. Obviously it is I who must change.

Please help, won't you? When you see me at the Dragonfly next Tuesday (and it isn't lost on me that the party inspires people to say "C U Next Tuesday"), whip your cunt out, if you've got one, and say, "Gram, this is my cunt. However unfortunate you think the word is, what it symbolizes is A-OK."

So you know, I also don't like the word Clamato.

Previously: Porn I'd like to see; Royster to Los Angeles: "I'm a fool to do your dirty work."
See also: Tightfit Productions, Gianna Lynn

Labels: events, tightfit, words

posted by Gram the Man at Thursday, February 22, 2007 | 0 Comments Links to this post

I refuse to believe corn-fed Memphis Monroe has a dark side, but how could she not if she is suddenly brunette? That is how we tell good from evil. That or if she started wearing sunglasses like when Hulk Hogan turned evil.

The Dark Side of Memphis Monroe features a post-Vivid, pre-Digital Playground Lacie Heart as well as Ana Nova and Mya Luanna.

Despite the brunettitude I still had trouble with the thought of horse-loving Monroe being bad. Then I noticed that Hustler had used the Ninnworx font and it all made sense.

Previously: Pharaoh Porn; No one sucks the joy from my Mikla Tan; Heather Vuur is a good sport; Tales from the darkside of Mya Luanna; Backroads of Memphis;
See also: Hustler

Labels: dvd, hustler, ninnworx, WGL

posted by Gram the Man at Wednesday, February 21, 2007 | 0 Comments Links to this post

Like a gang-banging St. Jude, Summer Haze for some reason will inscribe the names of "fallen stars from the family of X" into her Ladies X-Rated Wrestling Champion belt, presented recently at the Coastal Championship Wrestling smackdown in a high school gym in Cool Springs, Florida.

Haze's publicist writes:

Summer has been working hard for this and wants this belt to symbolize the people who have worked hard in the adult business in the past and present to make us the respected people we are today. So in Denver on February 23rd, Summers Belt will carry the names of fallen stars from the family of X in a special ceremony. Every few months, new members will be inducted until the belt is full. Not only will her belt symbolize the hard work and determination of the person wearing it, but the people who have fought to help us to get where we are today.

I can think of no better tribute to our nation's departed porn stars than to have their names on a wrestling belt wrapped snugly around Summer Haze.

According to the Coastal Championship Wrestling website, Ms. Haze is an executive assistant. The accompanying photos of the "Valentine Vengeance" event did not depict Haze actually wrestling to get the belt. Haze realizes that if wrestling is fake, why not just have a belt printed up rather than going through the motions?

I feel (w)restless and irritated with the You Just Don't Know How Stupid This Makes You Look aspect of porn today, particularly after also receiving an e-mail titled "Britney Rears to Shave Head Bald?" - but I'll get over it.

Starting an awards show always makes me feel better.

Previously: Summer Haze spreads boobs around; Canada finally validates Gram
See also: Coastal Championship Wrestling, Fallen Stars of X

Labels: awards, hype, just wrong, non-events

posted by Gram the Man at Wednesday, February 21, 2007 | 2 Comments Links to this post

There's so much information there that it's difficult to figure out.

Also, this woman looks less like a Rumor than she does a Gretel, or Maizie. This woman looks more like a Rumor, but would she like the Black fellows?

Previously: Gaping days are here again; Celebrating Black History Month the only way Porn knows how
See also: Lethal Hardcore

Labels: "lethal hardcore", dvd

posted by Gram the Man at Tuesday, February 20, 2007 | 0 Comments Links to this post

As you know, it is impossible for something to be sexually attractive until it turns 18. The lone exception is this Jagermeister dispenser here in the office.

A Parliament minister in Hungary, which is one of the most prolific porn producers in Europe, has inserted language into a draft of the larger penal code that would make it legal for Hungarians to make pornographic material with teens between 14 and 17, provided the teens are not related to or in the care of the pornographer and the material is not for commercial use.

"If we consider people 14 years of age to be mature enough to consent to sexual acts, then the chance to make picture recordings of this ... can also be allowed," Hungarian Justice Minister Jozsef Petretei said.

Detractors, most of them sputteringly incredulous that the state was even considering this, were able at least to say that the measure would create "a waiting room for prostitution".

This is my opinion, but I would assume that for such a proposal to be made - by the Justice Minister, no less - that porn involving 14-17-year-olds (if not younger) is already being produced to such an extent that the state feels the only way it can be controlled is to legalize and regulate it.

If the age of consent is 14 in that country, the idea of privately-held images of people acting out that consent shouldn't be shocking. After all, it's done that way here.

In the United States, it is illegal to shoot porn with a person under age 18 (and discussing this with a person under 18 is considered pandering), though the age of consent in many states is 17 or 16 (and, in the case of South Carolina, a very Hungarian 14). It is also my assumption that 18, the age of consent in porn groves Florida and California, is what determined the age of porn consent.

Can you imagine what wuld happen if it became legal to shoot 17-year-olds in the United States? Every copy of Barely Legal would spontaneously turn into a MILF title.

Many people in the adult industry believe that the age of porn consent should be 21. They argue that potential performers need a few years of having normal sex so that they aren't put on the fast track to rectal prolapse without having had a little time to figure out what their options really are.

I know plenty of mature and capable 18-21-year-olds, but I agree with this. It's arbitrary and in its arbitrariness unfair (and I know plenty of 30-year-old performers who are just as mature as an 18-year-old), but a waiting period between the age of consent and the age of one's first filmed gangbang is a smart idea.

In Hungary, Minister Petretei's portion of the draft will be voted on next week. It is hard not to make value judgments about this, despite the obvious trump card of having an age of consent that assumes maturity at 14. It's easy to imagine the malt shops and arcades of Budapest filling with newly-minted cameramen who just last week were pedophiles.

Previously: Glenn Beck: What's wrong with America; Report: Internet profitable; Why Johnny can't read; Girl, he be eating your pants; R. Kelly's brother: "I believe I can't lie"
See also: Hungary may legalize porn involving 14- to 17-year-olds for home use (usatoday)

Labels: commentary, Europe, Hungary, news

posted by Gram the Man at Tuesday, February 20, 2007 | 0 Comments Links to this post

This coloring book, created in 1975 by Craig Berlin from what appear to be infrared surveillance photos, was purchased at a New York bookstore by Manhattan blogger Jaime Morrison.

I thought we had collectively decided to stop freaking each other out (with art, anyway) by 1975, but I was wrong.

Previously: VCA embraces pixelation; "Now I've seen everything"; Porned Alaska; "My God, it's full of stars"
See also: Jaime Morrison's "The Nonist" (thanks to Duke Santos)

Labels: art, found

posted by Gram the Man at Tuesday, February 20, 2007 | 0 Comments Links to this post

Something about Havana Ginger's delta-sized nipples or the fact that director Banderas appears to have been carved into a pyramid wall makes this boxcover simultaneously unsettling and compelling, as if probing deeper might unleash a curse on one's family and descendants.

It is good to see, at least, that Banderas has joined these elite ranks.

I wish people would retire the phrase "dark side", though. All porn is a dark side, especially in terms of access to health benefits and parking. Best to use "gloomy and/or leather goods".

Previously: Friday fusillade of filth; Black Viking empties barrel on ladies; Tales from the darkside of Mya Luanna
See also: Mercenary Pictures

Labels: dvd

posted by Gram the Man at Monday, February 19, 2007 | 0 Comments Links to this post

Sexy Egyptian fireplug Cleopatra of the Nile is featured on one of Adultcon's billboards overlooking the 710 freeway and demands you drive there.

She writes:

Going NORTHBOUND on the 710 freeway, start south of the Firestone exit (city of DOWNEY or NORWALK) to be sure you can come from the 105 freeway and then go north on the 710 freeway or start from Imperial hwy and go north on the 710. You will see it before you hit Firestone Blvd exit on the LEFT HAND SIDE.

Here is a Google map of the area about which Tolkien wrote: "In Downey (south of Bell Gardens), where the shadows lie..."


Driving is your best bet, for:

One does not simply walk into Downey. Its black gates are guarded by more than just gas tanks and Winchell's Doughnuts. There is evil there that does not sleep. And the great Eye is ever watchful. It is a barren wasteland. Riddled with fire and ash and dust. The very air you breathe is a poisonous fume. Not with ten thousand men could you do this. It is folly!

Previously: KSEX Awards: Meaty
See also: Adultcon, Cleopatra of the Nile

Labels: adultcon, events, LOTR

posted by Gram the Man at Monday, February 19, 2007 | 0 Comments Links to this post

Amber Peach, with a new set of photos that make her look less like Ellie Mae Clampett and more like someone trying to get into the fetish market (and both are fine; it's just that I'm resistant to change) will be on Playboy Radio next Monday, February 26, from 5 to 6 p.m. PST.

Previously: Peach bites back; Day rate plus anal
See also: Playboy, Amber Peach

Labels: playboy, WGL

posted by Gram the Man at Monday, February 19, 2007 | 0 Comments Links to this post